POST 38: Lamenting Our Losses Together
POST 38
Lamenting Our Losses Together
Life isn’t always butterflies and rainbows. Um, 2020 and beyond, anyone?
If we’ve learned anything through this pandemic, it’s that life can be painful and disorienting. Doubt, fear, anger, disappointment, and grief are all emotions that are part of being human.
Sometimes it’s tempting to try to hold those feelings from one another—and from God. We might feel like we’ll be judged or even rejected. But the Bible is filled with stories, poems, and songs written by and about people who were sometimes very disappointed, and who brought those disappointments to God.
Room for All Our Feelings
Scripture calls this type of honest prayer lament.
In lament we pour out our emotions to God—pain, doubt, grief—and then remind ourselves and one another that God is still with us. Lament doesn’t always finish with a happy ending. Sometimes heartache comes and stays for a long time, but God is still there.
Maybe I (Brad) am kind of a downer, but laments are some of my favorite psalms. I like the raw, uncomfortable edges, the full breadth of human experience. Think about your favorite sad song—maybe about a breakup or bad relationship. Sometimes you feel better after you play a song like that, right? That’s the power of lament.
The point of lament isn’t to make everything better; the point is to make room for all our feelings. God isn’t only interested in our cheerful, grateful attitudes but also welcomes us in our disappointment, frustration, rage, and devastation. Even when we feel those emotions toward God. I don’t know about you, but that’s comforting for me to know.
Today we’re going to read a psalm of lament. You might want to prepare yourself first by closing your eyes for a minute and taking a few deep breaths.
When you’re ready, slowly read through the psalm printed in the “Reading God’s Word” section or read it in your own Bible. The writer of Psalm 77 has basically created two lists. The first ten verses line up complaints against God without holding much back. Then in verse 11, the list switches to the character and actions of God. This is how we lament.
Read through the passage a couple of times, paying attention to the emotions it brings up in you.
READING GOD’S WORD
I cry out loud to God—
out loud to God so that he can hear me!
During the day when I’m in trouble I look for my Lord.
At night my hands are still outstretched and don’t grow numb;
my whole being refuses to be comforted.
I remember God and I moan.
I complain, and my spirit grows tired. Selah
You’ve kept my eyelids from closing.
I’m so upset I can’t even speak.
I think about days long past;
I remember years that seem an eternity in the past.
I meditate with my heart at night;
I complain, and my spirit keeps searching:
“Will my Lord reject me forever?
Will he never be pleased again?
Has his faithful love come to a complete end?
Is his promise over for future generations?
Has God forgotten how to be gracious?
Has he angrily stopped up his compassion?” Selah
It’s my misfortune, I thought,
that the strong hand of the Most High is different now.
But I will remember the LORD’s deeds;
yes, I will remember your wondrous acts from times long past.
I will meditate on all your works;
I will ponder your deeds.
God, your way is holiness!
Who is as great a god as you, God?
You are the God who works wonders;
you have demonstrated your strength among all peoples.
With your mighty arm you redeemed your people;
redeemed the children of Jacob and Joseph. Selah (Psalm 77:1–15)
REFLECT AND RESPOND
Journaling Questions
Is it comfortable or uncomfortable for you to pray words like this writer prayed to God? Why?
Verses 11–15 of Psalm 77 focus on who God is and gratitude for God’s great actions. In the midst of times when you lament to God, what do you want to remember about God?
How do you lament with others? What could it look like to be more candid with your less-than-happy feelings around some other Christians?
Pray This Prayer
God who is with me in both joy and sorrow, remind me today that it’s safe to be honest with you about whatever I’m feeling. Give me safe people in my life who can accept me and all my uncomfortable emotions. In Jesus’ name, amen.
SOMETHING TO TRY
Create your own two lists. First, write down your doubts, hurts, fears, and disappointments. Take courage from the author of Psalm 77, and don’t hold anything back.
Then write another list of what you know to be true about God. Think through the character and actions you’ve heard about God from the Bible, but also think through your own life. Where has God been present and faithful to you?
Pray that God will see and hear all the things on your first list, and that God will be with you as you lean into trusting the second list to be true. Consider sharing your lists with someone you trust and lamenting together.
THE TAKEAWAY
We belong to God as our full selves, without needing to hide any of our emotions.