POST 7: When You Feel Like a Misfit
POST 7
When You Feel Like a Misfit
I think a lot about what other people think of me . . . whether or not somebody likes me. Whether they thought what I said was weird or stuff like that. I envy the people who are like “I don’t really care.” I wish that was me, but it’s not.
Sue
In a story in John 4, it was the hottest part of the day—a time of day when most people avoided the water well. So what was she doing there?
Fetching water was seen as a community activity. The women of the village would gather in the cool of the morning and talk as they drew water for the day. The fact that this Samaritan woman was at the well alone at noon already tells us she’s an outsider, a misfit.
Her conversation with Jesus tells us more. She’s had many husbands and has been labeled as undesirable and unwelcome. We don’t know the full story of how she wound up in this position, but we do know in that time only men could divorce their wives and not the other way around. If the Samaritan woman had been married and divorced several times, it’s likely because her husbands abandoned her.
Maybe she was alone at the well because she wanted to avoid having to mingle with the other women. She likely felt unworthy to even be in their presence. Or just tired of being made to feel that way. (You can read the entire story in John 4:4–42.)
Picture a cafeteria with students gathered around tables, talking excitedly about weekend plans as they eat lunch. Each table is filled with friends laughing and sharing stories.
Then there’s that one table where a girl sits alone, fidgeting with her fries. She doesn’t dress the same as everyone else and doesn’t have many friends. In fact, rumors have been circulating about her. Who she is, where she came from, what she did that one night with you-know-who. She feels alone and unworthy. She doesn’t dare raise her eyes to look at anyone for fear that too much attention will come her way. It’s better to lie low so the whispers don’t start up again.
That girl sits alone, but Jesus didn’t leave the Samaritan woman alone. In fact, he went out of his way to meet her at the well. He spoke to her in a time when Jews and Samaritans hated one another, and a rabbi wouldn’t be caught dead speaking to a Samaritan woman of her reputation. He threw the social rules out the window and shared with her something he had not told anyone—something special and profound.
Jesus tells her that he is the “I Am” (v. 26). The Messiah. The Christ. The Savior. God in flesh. He uses the Old Testament name for God, “I Am,” to confirm to this woman that he is, in fact, the one they have all been waiting for. It’s weird; instead of going to the most respected person in town, he chooses a woman who has been discarded by her community—a misfit.
That’s one of the beautiful things about Jesus.
He draws near to those who feel alone, rejected, and on the outs. He’s not scared of the rumors or the oddities. He welcomes the outcast, gives them a place of honor, and offers them “living water”—because we all belong to him. Our ultimate identity is not rejected, abandoned, victim, unworthy, outcast, misfit. No, our ultimate identity is welcomed, worthy, child of God.
The Samaritan woman asked, “Why do you, a Jewish man, ask for something to drink from me, a Samaritan woman?” (Jews and Samaritans didn’t associate with each other.)
Jesus responded, “If you recognized God’s gift and who is saying to you, ‘Give me some water to drink,’ you would be asking him and he would give you living water.”
The woman said to him, “Sir, you don’t have a bucket and the well is deep. Where would you get this living water? You aren’t greater than our father Jacob, are you? He gave this well to us, and he drank from it himself, as did his sons and his livestock.”
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks from the water that I will give will never be thirsty again. The water that I give will become in those who drink it a spring of water that bubbles up into eternal life.” (John 4:9–14)
REFLECT AND RESPOND
Journaling Questions
When have you felt like an outcast or a misfit? Did anyone reach out to you to bring you in?
What does Jesus say to the misfits? How does knowing Jesus welcomes everyone in make you feel?
Is there someone around you who might feel like a misfit? How can you show them Jesus’ kind of love?
Pray This Prayer
God, there are times when I feel like a misfit. I wonder where I fit and why I’m not accepted. But the truth is I’m not rejected by you. You love me, accept me, welcome me, and give me a place of honor. When doubt creeps in, remind me of your truth. In Jesus’ name, amen.
SOMETHING TO TRY
Is there a community in your city in which the people are treated like outcasts? This could be the unhoused, refugees, or any other group forgotten or pushed to the margins by society. Research how you can serve among this community and remind its members that they are loved and accepted.
THE TAKEAWAY
Misfits are welcomed by Jesus. Our ultimate identity is in a status given to us not by the world but by God.