302. The essence of Matrimony
302. THE ESSENCE OF MATRIMONY
What is marriage other than a legal piece of paper from the state?
Now such is the effect of matrimony (Gen 2:24): They shall be two in one flesh. . . .
Now things directed to one purpose are said to be united in their direction thereto. Thus many men are united in following one military calling or in pursuing one business, in relation to which they are called fellow-soldiers or business partners. Hence, since by marriage certain persons are directed to one begetting and upbringing of children, and again to one family life, it is clear that in matrimony there is a joining in respect of which we speak of husband and wife; and this joining, through being directed to some one thing, is matrimony; while the joining together of bodies and minds is a result of matrimony. (Thus these can occur without matrimony, but not matrimony without them) (S44,1).
Three things are to be considered in matrimony, namely its cause, its essence, and its effect. And accordingly we find three definitions given of matrimony. (1) The definition of Hugh (which is the vow) indicates the cause, namely the consent . . . (2) The definition given in the text indicates the essence of matrimony, namely the union . . . between lawful persons . . . (3) The remaining definition indicates the effect to which matrimony is directed, namely the common life in family matters.
Every community is regulated by some law; the law according to which this community is directed, namely divine and human law, finds a place in this definition, while other communities, such as those of traders or soldiers, are established by human law alone (S44,3).
When St. Thomas, following the Bible and the Church, says that two married people become “one flesh”, he is saying that marriage is an ontological transformation. Without ceasing to be two, they become one. “The joining together of bodies and minds is a result of Matrimony.”
(“Flesh” does not mean “body” merely, but “natural, fallen, mortal humanity”. Its opposite is not “soul” but “spirit”, that is, human nature supernaturalized by the Holy Spirit. There are different words in New Testament Greek for these two distinctions. “Soma” and “psyche” mean “body” and “soul”. “Sarx” and “pneuma” mean “flesh” and “spirit”.)
The will or consent of the couple is the cause of Matrimony, or marriage. Their common life together, including sexual and personal intercourse, and the creating of a family and children, is an effect of Matrimony. Matrimony’s essence is something more: it is the actual union between persons. It takes place in the sacrament, in a very short time. Its effect lasts for the rest of a lifetime.
A “person” is necessarily individual. Yet two individual persons can become one in marriage, and only in marriage. We might call it a “co-person” or a “double person”. A married couple is the only example in all created reality of a communal person. Outside marriage, communities are not real persons and persons are not communities.
There is, however, one other example of a communal person: God. He is one and He is three. Marriage is the closest image or analogy of the Trinity.
Unlike all other human communities, marriage is established not just by human law but by divine law. That is why Christ said: “What God has joined together, let no man put asunder.”
Therefore Matrimony is the first sacrament, the only natural as well as supernatural sacrament, the most important sacrament for society, and the completest reflection of “the image of God” (Gen 2:7). It is more important than the Church; for a world without the Church can have hope that the Church will appear, and once she does appear she will last until the end of time. In the remote past, before the call of Abraham, there was no Church and no chosen people, no Israel, yet the world was in good Providential hands. But if there is in the remote future a world without marriage, as in Brave New World, humanity is doomed.