Chapter II
An explication how the saints do grow. Many considerations to satisfy those
that discern not their growth.
HAVING given you the reasons, I will now explicate the point.
And that chiefly for the satisfaction of those whose main doubts and
troubles about their estate are occasioned by their want of discerning them
selves to grow, and so call into question the work begun, because not carried
on so sensibly unto perfection as they expect and desire.
Their objections are many and diverse.
They say, when they were young, they then had more spiritual enliven-
ings and quickness of affections, more joy in duties, &c. ; that formerly they had more zeal in what they did for the good of others, and more fruit of
their labours; that heretofore they have spent more time in duties, in con
ference, and hearing, &c. ; that others start up who have more grace the first
day than they have been getting many years. Yea, they are so far from
discerning that they grow, that they rather think that they fall back, and
therefore fear even the truth of grace in them, because all believers grow.
Now, the scope of all which I shall speak of this argument will tend to
this, to help such to discern and judge aright of their estates herein, and to
free them from such mistakes and errors as their objections are usually
founded upon.
I. And, first, concerning this kind of tentation and trouble, let me premise
this one observation, concerning what sort of converts this temptation is apt-
est to seize on.
You all know that there are two more eminent and conspicuous manner
of conversions of God s people usual in the church. The conversion of some
is more sudden and apparent, like the bringing of Joseph out of a dungeon
into a marvellous glorious light. It is with a sudden change, which there
fore is accompanied with a mighty violent inundation and land-flood of
humiliation for sin, increased with many gracious enlargements and dews
from heaven; which afterwards abating, and the stream settling and growing
less, and coming to an ordinary channel, and falling but unto so much as
the natural spring of grace, as I may so call it, will serve to feed, they then
begin to call all into question for their want of growth. Others, on the con
trary, whose conversion hath been insensible, and carried on with a still and
quiet stream, and have had a more leisurely, gentle thaw; and their change
from darkness to light hath not been sudden, but as the breaking forth of
the morning, small at first, and not discernible at what time day began then
to break : these, on the contrary, are exercised rather about the truth of the
work begun, about the work of conversion itself, and the right beginning of
all at first; but their tentations arise not from a want of growth so much,
for this to them is more evident and sensible, being like the morning light,
which grows clearer and clearer unto the perfect day, Prov. iv. 18.
THE TSIAL OP A CHRISTIAN S GSOWTH. [PART L
Now, observe the different condition of these two sorts. The former of these hath a more apparent work at first to shew as the evidence of their estate, but are apt, through desertions, neglects, and carnal presumption to call into question their progress in it, and from thence to question the truth of that first work begun. The other, on the contrary, sees a constant sprinand stream increasing, but cannot shew the well-head, or when or where the spring began. So that so apparent a work of grace begun would become matter of assurance to the one, but is checked with want of discerning growth answerable to such beginnings. But an apparent growth, and fast going up of the building,, comforts the other, but yet so as they still are apt to ques tion whether the foundation of such a building be well and surely laid that they are going on further to perfection, this they clearly see, but whether they come in at the right gate or no, that is the scruple which exerciseth their spirits. Thus hath our wise God, as in the work of his providence, so of his grace, set the one against the other, as Solomon speaks, that unto both toe there might be occasion of exercise left, that neither might con fide in any works wrought upon them, but fly alone to Christ and that neither should rejoice against the other, or be discontented with that way wherein God hath dealt with them.
II. In the second place, there are some considerations to be added con cerning a Christian s discerning his spiritual growth, which will be profitable to the thin in hand.
-V A\
> tllat our Bowing in grace is a mystery to be apprehended by iaith rather than by sense j our spiritual life itself is carried alonoby faith much more the discerning the increase of it. Yea, and it being carried on by contraries, as by falls and desertions, and even by our own opinions of our decrease, therefore it is rather discerned by faith than sense, for faith is the evidence of things not seen.
first
2. Secondly, the eager desire that many Christians have to have more grace, together with their going on to discern more and more their wants which in some respect is a growth, these do keep them from thinking that indeed they do grow. There is, as Solomon says,
< that maketh himself poor, and hath great riches, Prov. xiii. 7; because he enlargeth his desires
still, therefore still he thinks himself poor. So hungry and greedy Christians looking still to what they want, and not to what they have, are still com plaining and unthankful. If thou wouldst discern thy growth, do not com pare the copy with thy writing, but rather thy writing now with thy writinoat the first. For this is a sure rule, that the better thou learnest to write the better copy doth God daily set thee, that is, gives thee to see more strictness in the rule, and so still mayest think that thou wantest as much and art as far short as at first, if thus thou comparest thyself with nothing but thy sight of the rule itself. 3 The third consideration : that if growth at any time be made sensible, and be discerned by sense, yet so as after a while it is not so discernible as that great change which was made upon a man s first conversion : the reasons whereof are
(1.) For at first conversion the change was specifics!, wholly from want of grace unto beginnings of grace ; but the change in our growth afterwards is but gradual, that is, but addition of more degrees only, of something of the same kind still; and therefore it doth not so eminently affect the heart as the change at first conversion doth. To be translated out of a prison to a kingdom, as Joseph was, would affect more than to have new kingdoms added to one that is a king already, as Alexander had.
CHAP. II. J THE TEIAL OF A CHRISTIAN S GROWTH. 463
(2.) Because then the newness makes a great impression. One that begins anew to study any art, his growth is sensible, because everything he reads
is new ; whenas afterwards in his reading he meets with the same thing again and again, and with new notions but now and then, and yet he studies, it may be, harder, and learns what he knew before more perfectly, and adds new to his old.
4. A fourth consideration to discern thy growth
: there must be time al lowed j For the time, says the Apostle, they might have been teachers/ Heb. v. 12, implying they must have had time to grow up to perfection. Christians do not grow discernibly till after some space. The sun goes up higher and higher, but we discern not its progress till after an hour s motion. Things most excellent have the slowest growth
: bulrushes grow fast, but they are weaker kind of plants ; herbs, and willows, and alder-trees grow fast, but fall of pith ; oaks more slowly, yet more solidly, and in the end attain to a greater bulk.
5. Fifthly, consider the growth itself ; there may be a great difference thereof in several men. You heard that every man hath a measure appointed to which he must grow \ but men are brought to this fulness several ways, which makes a difference in their growth.
(1.) First, some have the advantage of others at first setting out; God
gives them a great stock of grace at first, and that for these causes :
* the last of the
[1.] When there is a present use of them. Paul was
apostles, born out of time, as himself complains, as one that was set to school
long after the rest of the apostles, and yet came not behind any of them in
grace, because God was to use him presently. To some God gives five
talents, to others but two ; so that he that hath five hath as much given him at first as he that had but two with all his gains all his lifetime.
[2.] When a man is converted late, as he that came into the vineyard at the eleventh hour was furnished with abilities to do as much as the rest, for
they all received but a penny.
(2.) Secondly, in the manner of their growth some have advantage of
others.
[1.] Some grow without intermission, as that great Apostle, and the Colos-
e from the first day they heard of the gospel, brought forth fruit, Col. i. 6. Others have rubs, and for some time of their lives stand at a stay. And thus some do presently after their first conversion, as the church of
sians, who
Ephesus, who fell from her first love. Others in old age, as the Hebrews,
* who when for the time they might have taught others, were so far cast be
hind, that they had need be taught again the first principles of religion, Heb. v. 12. Measure therefore not so your growth by a piece of your fives, but by comparing your whole life together.
[2.] Some die sooner, and therefore God fits them for heaven sooner. Dorcas died rich in good works ; Stephen died full of the Holy Ghost, Acts vii. It is with several Christians as with several planets
: the moon
goes her course in a month, the sun in a year, the rest in many years, so as
often they that live shortest grow fastest.
464 TEE TRIAL OF A CHRISTIAN S GROWTH. [PART I.