Chapter II
The particulars of the distress contained in these two phrases : ivalkiny in darkness ; having no light.
THE second thing to be inquired into is, What is the condition of such a one who is thus in darkness, and who hath no light ? Which I will so far dis
cover, as the phrases used here will give light into, by the help of other
Scriptures.
1. First, he is said to have no light. Light/ saith the Apostle, Eph. v.
13, is that whereby things are made manifest, that is, to the sense of sight, to which light properly belongs ; and as light and faith are here severed, as you see, so sight also is, in 2 Cor. v. 7, distinguished from faith, which
is the evidence of things absent and not seen, Heb. xi. 1. When, therefore, here he says he hath no light, the meaning is, he wants all present sensible testimonies of God s favour to him ; he sees nothing that may give sensible
present witness of it to him. God s favour, and his own graces, and all the sensible tokens and evidences thereof, which are apprehended by spiritual
sight, are become all as absent things, as if they were not, or never had been ; that light which ordinarily discovers these as present, he is clean deprived of.
To understand this, we must know that God, to help our faith, which, as I said before, is distinguished from sight, as we now speak of it, vouchsafeth a threefold light to his people, to add assurance and joy to their faith ; which
is to faith as a back of steel to a bow, to strengthen it, and made to be taken
off or put on to it at God s good pleasure.
(1.) First, the immediate light of his countenance7 which is a clear, evident beam and revelation of God s favour, immediately testifying that we are his, which is called the sealing of the Spirit, received after believing, Eph. i. 13 ; which David desired, and rejoiced in more than in all worldly things, Ps.
iv. 6, Lord, lift up the light of thy countenance; in which, more or less, in some glimpses of it, some of God s people have the privilege to walk with
joy from day to day : Ps. Ixxxix. 15, They shall walk in the light of thy countenance ; in thy name shall they rejoice all day. And this is here utterly withdrawn ; and it may thus come to pass, that the soul, in regard of any sense
or sight of this, may be left in that case that Saul really was left in, 1 Sam.
xxviii. 15, God is departed from me, and answers me not, neither by pro phets nor by dreams; though with this difference, that God was really departed from Saul, but to these but in their own apprehensions
: yet so
as, for aught they can see of him, God is departed clean from them ; answers them neither by prayer, nor by word, nor by conference ; they cannot get one good look from him. Such was Jonah s case, chap. ii. 4,
1 1 am cast out of thy sight ; that is, he could not get a sight of him, not one smile, not one
glance or cast of his countenance, not a beam of comfort, and so thought himself cast out. And so he dealt with David often, and sometimes a long time together
: Ps. xiii. 1, How long wilt thou hide thy face from me ? and,
240 A CHILD OF LIGHT WALKING IN DARKNESS. [PART I.
Ps. Ixxxix. 46, How long, &c. ; even so long as David puts God in remem
brance, and pleads how short a time in all he had to live, and complains how
in much of that time his face had been hid from him, ver. 47. And the like was Heman s case, and this also long, even from his youth up, Ps. Ixxxviii.
14, 15. So from Job, chap. xiii. 24. Yea, and from Christ himself, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me V
But concerning this you will ask, How can this dealing of his stand with
his everlasting love, continued notwithstanding to the soul, that he should
deal so with one he loves ; but especially how it may stand with the real
influence of his grace, powerfully enabling the soul all that while to go on
to fear and obey him 1
For the first ; it may stand with his everlasting love, and God may be his God still, as the text tells us ; so, Isa. liv. 8,
* For a moment I have hid my
face, but with everlasting kindness will I have mercy on thee. It is but
hiding his face, and concealing his love, as David concealed his love from
Absalom, when his bowels yearned towards him. And God takes the liberty that other fathers have, to shut his children out of his presence when he is
angry. And it is but for a moment, that is, in comparison of eternity, though haply it should be thus with him during a man s whole life ; and he
therefore takes liberty to do it, because he hath such an eternity of time to
reveal his kindness in ; time enough for kisses and embraces, and to pour forth his love in.
And for the second ; the real gracious influences and effects of his favour may be continued, upholding, strengthening, and carrying on the soul still
to obey and fear him, whilst he yet conceals his favour. For, when Christ
complained, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken meT when as great an eclipse in regard of the light of God s countenance was upon his spirit as was upon the earth, yet he never more obeyed God, was never stronglier
supported, than at that time, for then he was obeying to the death. Like as we see that when the sun is eclipsed, though the earth wants the light of it,
yet not the influence thereof; for the metals which are engendered in the bottom of the earth are concocted by the sun ; so as though the light of the sun comes not to them, yet the influence and virtue of it doth, and altereth and changeth them. So doth God s favour visit men s hearts in the power,
heat, and vigorous influence of his grace, when the light and comfort of it doth not, but is intercluded. Deus se communicat, vel qud beatus, vel qud
sanctus; qud beatus, gaudium et gloriam; qud sanctus, gratiam: utrumque voluntane^ ideoque non utrumque simul necessario.
(2.) The second light which God vouchsafeth his people ordinarily to help and eke out their faith, is the sight and comfort of their own graces, unto which so many promises belong; as, of their love to his people, fear of his
name, desire to obey him. So that often when the sun is set, yet starlight appears ; that is, though that other, the immediate presence and evidence of
his favour, shines not on the soul, yet his graces therein appear, as tokens of
that his love : so as the soul knows that there is a sun still, that gives light to these stars, though it sees it not ; as in the night we know that there is a sun in another horizon, because the stars, we see, have their light from it, and we are sure that it will arise again to us.
Now a soul that hath true grace in it, and goes on to obey God, may also want light to see these his graces, and look upon his own heart as empty of
all. And as they in the storm, Acts xxvii. 20, so he in temptation may come to have neither sunlight nor starlight; no light, as in the text.
Thus, Isa. Ixiii. 17, the church there complains that God had hardened them
CHAP. II] A CHILD OF LIGHT WALKING IN DARKNESS. 241
from his fear ; they were afraid, feeling their hearts so hard, that the fear of God was wanting ; which yet was there, for they complain of the want of it.
(3.) But yet, thirdly, though he want the present light of God s counte nance, and the sight of present grace, yet he may have a comfortable re membrance of what once before he had still left, and so long is not utterly left in darkness. Therefore further know, that the state of one that fears God and obeys him may be such as he may have no comfortable light or remembrance of what grace, &c., formerly he had, 2 Pet. i. 9. One that hath true grace in him only lacks the exercise of it, for I take it that place is to be under stood of a regenerate man, because he was
< purged from sin, and is now said to lack^grace because he doth not use it ; for idem est non habere, et non uti, a man is said not to have that which he doth not use when he ought to use
it, especially in things whose worth lies wholly in use and employment, for it is as good as if he had it not. Now, such a man may fall into such a blindness that he cannot see afar off, and so forgets his former assurance, that he was purged from his old sins ; yea, it may be, calls all into question. Thus David, in Ps. xxx. 6, 7, though his heart was but even now, a little before, full of joy and assurance of God s favour, yet God did but hide his face, and all was gone;
< I was troubled, says he. He was thus blind, and could not see what was but a little past him, as it is with men in a mist.
And the reason of these two last assertions is as evident as the experience thereof.
^ For graces in us shine but with a borrowed light, as the stars do, with a light borrowed from the sun. So that unless God will shine secretly, and give light to thy graces, and irradiate them, thy graces will not appear to comfort thee, nor be at all a witness of God s favour to assure thee. For our spirit, that is, our graces, never witness alone; but if God s Spirit joineth not in testimony therewith, it is silent : The Spirit of God witnesseth with our spirits/ Kom. viii. 16. Now therefore, when God hath withdrawn his
testimony, then the testimony of our hearts, and of our own graces^ hath no force in it.
But you will say, Can a man have the exercise of grace and not know it ? fear God, &c., and not discern it ?
Yes; and some graces may then be as much exercised in the heart as at any other time. He may fear God as truly and as much as ever, and yet this fear have no light in it to discover itself to him ; it may be in the heart in esse et operari, when not in cognosci,ft may have a being and a working there, when not in thy apprehension. The reason is, because, as the influence of God s favour may be really in the heart, when the sense, sight, and light of it is withdrawn, as was said before ; so the power of grace may in like manner be in the heart when the light and comfort thereof is wanting. And although it is true that every man having the power of reflecting upon his own actions, can discern what thoughts are in him and what affections, and can tell, for the matter of them, what he thinks on, that he puts his trust, and that he is grieved,
<fcc. but yet so as he may still question whether those thoughts be acts of true and unfeigned faith, and whether those affections of sorrow for sin,
<fec be sanctified affections, holy, and genuine, and spiritual affections; and the reason of the difference is, because though the natural spirit which is in a man knows the things of a man, as the apostle hath it, 1 Cor. ii. 11 (that is, his own thoughts, &c., understanding them physically, as they are acts of a man), yet what is the true goodness of them morally, in discerning this VOL. in. Q
242 A CHILD OF LIGHT WALKING IX DAKKNESS. [PART I,
the spirit of a man is deceitful, and cannot know it/ Jer. xvii. 9, without the
supernatural light of the Spirit of God, who as lie is the giver and actor of that
grace in us, so is given of God that we might know the things which are
given us of God, 1 Cor. ii. 12. Light is sown for the righteous, and joy for the upright, says the Psalmist. Grace, and the exercise of it, is the seed which they continually scatter; but light and joy is the crop that is to be
reaped. The seed often lies hid long, though it will come up in the end. Thus light or joy may be severed from grace ; and the comfort of it from
the power of it.
2. Secondly, let us further consider the other phrase, and what is inti mated thereby to be his condition, when, as it is said, he walks in darkness :
(1.) First, to walk in darkness implies to be in doubt whither to go; soJohn xii. 35, He that walks in darkness knows not whither he goes. And
thus the soul of one that fears God may be filled with doubts whether God
will ever be merciful to him, yea or no, and not know what God means to do with him, whether he shall go to heaven or hell. Ps. Ixxvii. 7-9, Will the Lord be merciful? which speeches are spoken doubtingly; for, ver. 10, he says, this was his infirmity, to call this into question. So Heman, Ps.
Ixxxviii. 5, G, 11, 12 : he thought himself as one that was in hell, free among the dead, that is, as one admitted free into the company of them
there, ver. 5 ; free of that company, as you use to say, and of the number of
those whom God no more remembered : in such darkness was he, ver. 6. And to raise him out of that condition was a thing he doubted whether God would ever do, ver. 10-12 : Wilt thou shew \vonders to the dead? shall
thy wonders be declared in the grave ? that is, Did God ever shew mercy to one that was in the same state that they in hell are in? which is my state now ; yea, so as to be out of hope. So Lam. iii. 18, My hope is perished from the Lord.
(2.) Secondly, those in darkness are apt to stumble at everything. So
Isa. lix. 10 ; one effect of darkness, mentioned there, is to stumble at noon
day. So take a soul that is left in darkness, and it will stumble at all it hears out of the word, either in conference or at sermons ; all it reads, all
promises it meets with, it is more discouraged by them. Oh, think they, that there should be such glorious promises, and not belong to us ! Such a one misapplies and misinterprets all God s dealings and the Scriptures against
himself, and refuseth comfort, as Ps. Ixxvii. 2 ; yea, and, as at the 3d verse, when he remembers God, he is troubled.
(3.) Thirdly, darkness is exceeding terrible and full of horror. When
children are in the dark, they think they see fearful sights ; it is therefore
called the horror of darkness, Gen. xv. 12. So his soul here may be filled with fears and terrors from God s wrath, and of God s being an enemy to
him. Heman was almost distracted and out of his wits with terrors, Ps.
Ixxxviii. 15. So the church thought, Lam. iii.; yea, and concluded it for
certain that God was her enemy
: Surely he is turned against me/ ver. 3.
CHAP. III.] A CHILD OP LIGHT WALKING IN DARKNESS.