August 30
August 30
Because wandering away from the Lord is often a process, sometimes it’s hard for us to see how far we have fallen from where we once were.
For much of my life, I was a very angry man. Luella, my dear wife, knew I was angry, and my children knew I was angry, but I didn’t know I was angry. I was a pastor. I viewed myself not as an angry man but as a man who had given his life to serve the Lord. I was participating in the destruction of my life and ministry, but I did not see or understand it. Luella tried again and again to help me see my anger, but I would tell her what a good guy I was. My anger hadn’t exploded overnight. No, it developed over time, until I was no longer the man I had been when I had married Luella and first entered into my ministry calling. I was so blind to how much anger had taken ahold of me that it made me angry every time the subject came up. I had no clue as to how far I had fallen until God opened my eyes in a dramatic moment and provided the rescue I needed from myself and my sin.
I don’t think that my experience was unique. I am deeply persuaded that this is how sin works. Sin is deceitful. It is able to hide in the cracks, to work in the darkness, to sneak around the corner, and to whisper in the shadows. Sin doesn’t tend to take hold of your heart in one dramatic moment of conquest. It is an enemy that enters your house as a friendly guest, but over an extended time takes control over you and what belongs to you. Sin is a false guide that leads you down a road with promises of a beautiful destination, while actually leading you to your death. Sin is a lamb that turns out to be a lion. Sin presents itself as a lover, while planning to betray you. Sin often does its work so slowly that it lulls you to sleep while you are perched on the edge of a cliff.
The children of Israel progressively wandered away from the Lord. They experienced not one big dramatic moment of moral betrayal, but rather ten thousand steps away from God, away from his commands, and away from the worship that belonged to him alone. They became a very different people from what they once were. It was hard to look at their life, their culture, their leaders, and their worship and think that they were the people of God.
How bad had it gotten? These words say it all: “I sought for a man among them who should build up the wall and stand in the breach before me for the land, that I should not destroy it, but I found none” (Ezek. 22:30). God looked for one righteous man who would fight this progressive cycle of evil, but found none!
May God give us eyes to see where we have wandered away from him.