13. The Art of Giving Thanks
"To be grateful is to recognize the love of God in everything he has given us – and he has given us everything." – Thomas Merton
It is one of the great truths of Christian life that thankfulness lies at the core of our attitude toward God. This is what the scripture implies in saying "We love him because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19) – we thankfully return God's love for us. So giving thanks should be a central part of every Christian's life and a core part of our prayers. Yet this is an area in which we can all improve – and one that, if we develop it, can greatly enrich our relationship with God. No "Thank You"? Some people think that because the model prayer outline given by Jesus to his disciples (Matthew 6:9-13 and Luke 11:2-4) does not contain any word of thanks, thanksgiving is not a necessary part of regular prayer. It is important that we understand why this is not the case, and why nothing could be further from the truth.
The disciples knew that it was certainly Jesus' custom to give thanks. We see examples of this not only in his giving thanks for food (Matthew 14:19), but also in the thanks included in his other prayers (for example, John 11:41). When we look at the Lord's Prayer, we see that the context was one of things for which we should ask (Matthew 6:7-8), rather than focusing on other dimensions of prayer. So we can presume that the disciples, knowing Jesus' own example, would understand that rather than a separate point of thanks in prayer, every request was to be made with thanks – both for help already given in that area and in faithful expectation of God's continued help.
Thus the apostle Paul wrote: "… in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God" (Philippians 4:6, emphasis added). Paul also showed that our attitude in prayer should be one of: "… always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ" (Ephesians 5:20). Such an attitude of thankfulness follows the example of Jesus himself and explains why the Lord's Prayer has no separate point of thanksgiving – every part of that outline prayer should be offered with thanks!
But strange as it might seem to anyone who is appreciative of the many blessings we all enjoy, thankfulness is not a common human trait. Paul stressed this fact in several of his letters (Romans 1:21, 2 Timothy 3:2, etc.). You doubtless remember the story of how Jesus healed ten lepers on one occasion and how, after he sent them to purify themselves at the temple, only one of the ten returned to thank him (Luke 17:11-19).
That story teaches us several important principles. It records Jesus' words "Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine?" (vs. 17), showing as well as any other scripture in the Bible God's desire to see thankfulness expressed and his sadness when it is not. But Luke also tells us that the one who did return "… came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus' feet and thanked him …" (Luke 17:15-16). Notice that the man both praised and thanked God. As we will see, thanksgiving is closely related to praise, and we do not fully praise if we do not thank. Thanksgiving as Worship The Bible makes many references to the fact that God views thanksgiving as praise and that our praise is not complete without it. The Book of Psalms continually urges us to worship God with thanksgiving as well as praise – as we see in these examples:
It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to your name, O Most High (Psalm 92:1 ESV).
Let us come into His presence with thanksgiving and praise him with music and song! (Psalm 95:2). Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name (Psalms 100:4). Notice that in these and in other examples, thanksgiving is actually mentioned before praise as the first aspect of our worship that is being stressed. This relationship between thanksgiving and praise is not just an Old Testament concept. Paul told the Christians at Corinth: "All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God" (2 Corinthians 4:15). A few chapters later Paul makes the point even more explicitly: "This service that you perform … is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, others will praise God…" (2 Corinthians 9: 12-13).
In fact, we can say that we cannot properly worship God without regular, heartfelt giving of thanks. That is exactly what the author of the Book of Hebrews meant in writing: "let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe" (Hebrews 12:28B). But even when we do wish to show our thankfulness, we can often improve in the active, ongoing expression of our gratitude. How do we do that? The apostle Paul tells us in a statement that is perfectly captured in the Holman translation of the Bible: "Devote yourselves to prayer; stay alert in it with thanksgiving" (Colossians 4:2 HSCB). Paul tells us that we need to "stay alert" in our thanksgiving – we need to continually be watching for the things we can and should express our gratitude for.
That "staying alert" involves being sure to give thanks for things we might otherwise take for granted – we can become accustomed to even the greatest blessings if we do not think about them – and we need to look with seeing and grateful eyes at our own lives, our families, homes, jobs, and friends. But thankfulness also involves being willing to see things outside of the moment in which we live.
Thankfulness through Time In his letter to the Philippians Paul gives another dimension of gratitude: that we should give thanks not only for things throughout "space" – the blessings of the family, home, work, recreation, relationships and friendships near and far – but that we should also give thanks for things throughout time.
This does not just mean in an ongoing manner, which is right and good, of course, but also regarding the different parts of time. Events of the present are naturally things for which we should express ongoing appreciation; but because we live in the present, we can often limit our thankfulness to gratitude for that which we see around us in the here and now. Paul shows that deep and full gratitude extends further than that.
One of the first things Paul mentions as he begins his letter to the Philippian church is that "I thank my God every time I remember you" (Philippians 1:3). It had clearly been some time since Paul had seen the brethren in that congregation, and his statement is one not only of affection for them, but also one of giving thanks for his time with them in the past. Paul is certainly clear that we do not need to dwell on the misfortunes and mistakes of the past (Philippians 3:13), but shows here that we can certainly remember the good aspects with a spirit of thanksgiving.
This is true of many things and is especially true of relationships. So often we remember the good times with spouses, friends and family members after they are no longer alive. Paul's words remind us that we can remember the good past things of our relationships and be thankful for them now. But the principle of gratitude for past things certainly extends beyond relationships. In fact, many of Paul's letters express his thankfulness for the spiritual growth that had occurred in the lives of those to whom he writes.
Paul also extends the theme of thankfulness in Philippians into the future by saying that one of the reasons for his gratitude and joy was "being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 1:6 and see vss. 9-11). We see the same thought in some of Paul's other letters, such as Colossians: "…giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light" (Colossians 1:12). This is not just "positive thinking" about the future – it's an attitude of thankfulness for the future! It is a mark of Paul's faith – and ours – that when we are certain of things to come, we are thankful for them just as much as for things we see and receive in the present moment.
So Paul shows that giving thanks for the blessings of the past, as well as those events to which we look forward, is just as much a part of true thanksgiving as gratitude for every good thing we experience in the present. Beyond Thankful There is another important lesson we can learn about true thankfulness. We may know the Bible verses encouraging us to express gratitude in our prayers, even for things beyond the moment, yet the Bible shows that we can be grateful and yet not fully thankful in the way God desires us to be.
Take, for example, that famous Pharisee in Jesus' parable – the one whose prayer extolled his own virtue and religious deeds while rejoicing that he was not a sinner like others. Jesus did not say that the man simply bragged about his spiritual life to God – he said he thanked God for it: "The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other people – robbers, evildoers, adulterers – or even like this tax collector'" (Luke 18:11). Clearly, the Pharisee's thanksgiving was really only an extension or proclamation of his own self-satisfaction.
So it is possible to give thanks to God and yet to miss true thankfulness because of what it is that we appreciate. Consider some of the ways we can make this mistake in our own lives in terms of the things for which we give thanks.
Do we only give thanks for our physical things – such as our family, our friends, our health? Put another way, how much of our thanksgiving is not for our physical things but for help, blessings, and growth in the lives of others? That is the very opposite of the Pharisee's prayer.
Do we only give thanks for our physical things – such as our job, our relationships, our country? How much of our gratitude is expressed not for our physical things, but for the help, guidance, encouragement and other spiritual gifts with which we and others have been blessed?
Do we only give thanks for our physical things – our home, our food, our possessions? How much of our appreciation is expressed to God not for things, but for actions and qualities – for love and truth, for patience and strength, for all such good qualities whether experienced directly from God or in the lives of those he indwells?
Finally, how much of our thankfulness is expressed along with praise of God? The Pharisee's thanks were tied to praise of himself, and it is possible for our own thanks to sometimes focus on our successes and accomplishments. These are valid things to give thanks for, but they may be only a short way from personal pride. As we have seen, the Book of Psalms constantly reminds us of the connection between thanksgiving and praise, and where the focus of that praise should be: "I will praise God's name in song and glorify him with thanksgiving" (Psalm 69:30, emphasis added).
While we may not be as far from real gratitude as the Pharisee in Christ's parable, it is often profitable to think about what does move us to give thanks. What we are grateful for can be a window into our soul. It's something we should all reflect upon occasionally.
But the more we come to know and love God, the more we will grow in wanting to give thanks for ourselves and for others. Thanksgiving, like praise, is one of the most uplifting aspects of talking with God. With a little thought, we can find thousands of reasons for expressing overflowing thankfulness in prayer.