CHAPTER XVII Of the bearing by Jesus of His Cross, and His being led forth to the place which was called Calvary
CHAPTER XVII
Of the bearing by Jesus of His Cross, and His being led forth to the place which was called Calvary
I BLESS Thee, and give thanks to Thee, O Lord Jesus Christ, true Vine, Way of Life, and our Salvation, for bearing before all men Thy heavy and shameful Cross. For the Salvation of the whole human race, Thou didst vouchsafe humbly to take it up, and most patiently to bear it; that so, upon Thy own Shoulders, Thou mightest bring back, to Thy home in Heaven, the lost sheep so long sought after, and found with so much toil and trouble.
I laud and magnify Thee, illustrious Standard-bearer of the army of Christ, for Thy sorrowful and distressing journey, when, with the heavy wood of the cross roughly laid upon Thee, Thou wast ignominiously led forth outside the walls of that renowned city, in which Thou hadst so often manifested forth Thy glory by miracles worked, and holy doctrine taught therein. Now, however, amid the furious outcries of the whole people arrayed against Thee, Thou art treated as a comrade of thieves, and a chief of robbers, and art going forth to be hanged, as one utterly vile and worthless, upon the highest cross of all, between two of the worst of malefactors.
I praise and glorify Thee, most gracious Jesus, for that cruel and most wearisome progress, for that journey amid such horrible surroundings, which Thou didst undertake for us. I praise and glorify Thee for each step Thou didst take; for the exceeding weariness and weakness of Thy Body caused by Thy previous sufferings; for the ascents and descents of the winding road, made more grievous to Thee by the burden of Thy Cross; for the haste with which Thou wast at one time urged forward from behind, and at another time dragged roughly on from in front, by the hard-hearted men of the guard in charge of Thee; hither and thither buffeted about by them. For Thou couldst only move with Thy Body bent almost double from the weight of that burden, so far beyond Thy strength, which Thou wast compelled to bear to the Hill of Calvary. Never before hadst Thou trodden so cruel a road; never before hadst Thou borne so grievous a yoke.
I laud and magnify Thee for the despiteful usage Thou hadst to endure from those brutish men who led Thee forth to execution, at one time abusing Thee, at another ill-treating Thee. I laud and magnify Thee for the many vile words which they used to Thee; for the many false slanders against Thy innocence which they hurled at Thee, as Thou wentest Thy weary way; for the insolent exultation of Thy enemies at the cruel death awaiting Thee, and for their savage joy at the hope of seeing Thee hang upon the shameful Cross—amidst all which horrors, heaped upon Thee from every side, Thou didst go as a meek lamb carried forth for sacrifice, having before Thee our salvation as Thy aim; pitying the blindness of the Jews; and sorrowing over the malice of those who were leading Thee to the place of execution.
I praise and bless Thee for the loving hearts of Thy friends; for the abundant tears of compassion which they shed for Thee; and for the faithful companionship of the sad-hearted women, who step by step followed Thee on Thy way, with looks modestly downcast, most bitterly bewailing Thee. Turning to them, Thou didst restrain their mournful sobs with these gracious words: “Daughters of Jerusalem, weep not over Me, but weep for yourselves, and for your children. For if in the green wood they do these things, what shall be done in the dry?” O how bitter at that time was the grief of those who were dear to Thee, and how above all bitter was the lamentation of the holy women, who looked at Thee with eyes full of compassion, but were unable to come near to Thee, or to save Thee from going to Thy death.
And how inconceivably great must have been the woe which filled, and racked, the Mother’s heart of Mary the Virgin, as she saw Thee, her only, her most dearly loved Son, bearing the Wood of the Cross, and going forth to die! O how willingly, had it been possible, would Thy blessed Mother, the most loving Virgin Mary, have endured for Thy sake the terrible shame of the Cross; and how gladly would she have offered herself to die instead of Thee, had she thought that this would have been pleasing to Thee. But that which was actually not possible, nor permitted, that mentally she did indeed bear to the full; for who, among the sons of men, could compassionate Thee so fully, could mourn for Thee so keenly, could so truly bear Thy cross with Thee, as she, who loved Thee so fervently? No other heart of those who loved Thee could Thy anguish have so deeply pierced, as the loving heart of the one who was Thy Mother, the Virgin of surpassing love.
Nor may we doubt that Mary Magdalene, whose love for Thee burnt so brightly, and the bitterness of whose sorrow for Thee had made her scarcely able to stand, would, with a supreme effort of love, have willingly joined Thy Virgin Mother in laying hold upon Thy Cross, and would gladly have borne it with her in Thy stead.
The inward burden of Thy anguish was thus in many ways increased; for beside it, Thou didst also have to bear the things that came upon Thee from without, Thy being forsaken, namely, by Thy disciples, Thy Mother’s grief, the stumbling-block which Thy tribulation was to many, and the faint-heartedness of those who despaired of Thy Resurrection: for, except that of the glorious Virgin, the faith of all was wavering, or seemed to be extinct.
O faithful disciple of Christ, make thou also haste to share the burden of the mystic Cross; and, if thou wouldst attain to joys eternal, strive now to follow thy Redeemer’s steps. Shrink not from the slight hardship of a penance set thee, seek not to have the severity of discipline made less; but think that to be easy and light which the Rule of thy Order bids thee bear; fulfil with joy whatever holy obedience requires of thee. Should it seem to thee hard to obey its every precept, remember that for thy sake Christ became obedient to precepts harder still, even to the most shameful death of the Cross. Keep, then, the strict Rule of the Fathers, quit not the path which leads to a throne. Shun that easier lot, by choosing which the slothful are so often brought to a bad end. On entering Religion, thou didst indeed take upon thy shoulders the Holy Cross, and, on being Professed, thou didst bind thyself to it still closer. To lead a holy and perfect life in Religion is to follow the Crucified. By observing the Rule of thy Order with all thy heart, thou bearest thy cross cheerfully. If thou bearest it unwillingly and grudgingly, not the Glory of Jesus, but the cross of the impenitent thief, will be thy reward; but if thou endurest all things willingly and joyfully, thou hast in great part won thy victory over the evil one. Fear not, therefore, the strictness of thy Order, nor count the days long that thou passest in it: the love of Christ and the sweetness of a good life will lighten the burden of thy hardships. There is One Who lived a life far harder, and Who set thee an absolutely perfect example, even Jesus the Son of God, the great Patron of the Cross, Who Himself made full proof of its weight. Follow, therefore, thy Saviour along the way of the Cross, by holding fast to thy life in Religion, and by never growing careless in the observance of thy vows, and thou shalt be safe for ever. For hadst thou wished to enjoy the good things of this life, or to follow thy own business or pleasures, thou mightest have remained in the world. As, however, thou hast chosen to follow Christ by entering Religion, hold fast to the Rule to which thou hast promised obedience. Pray Jesus to give thee His powerful help in doing this; for He Who at the outset gave thee grace to begin well, will doubtless perfect the good work which He began in thee.
O my dearly loved Jesus, Prince of the kings of the earth, Leader of the Angelic Host, illustrious Standard-bearer of all Christians, Who, for the salvation of Thy servants, and that Thou mightest set them a perfect example, didst bear upon Thine own shoulders Thy cross, amidst the jeers and scoffs of the Jews who surrounded Thee, grant me grace, slow of heart though I be, to follow Thee along Thy weary road; be with me to the end; and then lead, I pray Thee, my soul, now absent from its true home, from this body of sin to the Mount of Calvary, the hill of myrrh and frankincense, where Thou wast, for my sake, crucified and slain, that there I may rest under the shadow of Thy Cross, safe beneath its holy sign. Grant that I may now make a fresh start, and may follow Thee, not with the infirmity of purpose of those who are neither hot nor cold, but with renewed fervour of heart; keeping my eyes steadily fixed upon Thee, the Cross-bearer, and not letting them stray hither and thither like those who are inconstant in their ways. Be Thou my guide along the narrow road, and my companion as I follow it: be Thou at hand to help me when things are going well with me, to comfort me when they are going wrong, to sustain me in all the trials which I may have to undergo for the sake of Thy Holy Name. Help me to bear the burden and heat of the day, that I may be able to join my brethren in every Divine Office and holy observance. Grant me also, in my more serious troubles and anxieties, to call to mind Thy most cruel weariness under the burden of Thy Cross; for the paltry burden which is laid upon me will seem the merest trifle, if I think of the weight of the heavy Cross which Thou wast content to bear.
May I, then, trusting to the help of Thy grace, with a willing heart submit to, and even rejoice in, the burden of the life in Religion which I have taken upon me; for even if for a while, in order that I may win the merit of humility, Thou dost suffer me to feel it heavy, yet afterwards, at such time, and in such way, as Thou seest fit, Thou dost mercifully give me the grace of Thy ready help in bearing it. Teach me to conquer my own will, to be content with few things, and not to hanker after leave to walk abroad. May my hands be ever busy in the work which I have to do; may my heart be ever occupied in meditating upon Holy Writ; may all my limbs be employed in Thy service, all my senses kept under strict control; number me, I beseech Thee, poor and of no account though I be, among Thy true cross-bearers. Keep me from mixing with men of the world, and mortify in me all the desires of the flesh. May I never concern myself with the affairs of others, nor deal in idle gossip; but may I strive to keep my thoughts fixed upon the concerns of my own inner life, and to grieve in secret, with many a sigh and groan, over all the various things which I have done that I ought not to have done, and have left undone that I ought to have done. May I lay aside everything that would hinder my spiritual progress. May I run in the way of those who seek Thee, and have learnt to rise above things temporal by keeping their thoughts fixed upon the things that are above. May I ever keep carefully in mind Thy Cross, so lovingly borne for my sake; and while I burn with love of the Cross, may I at the same time commit all my ways into Thy hands, and resign my will to Thine: and so, patiently and submissively bearing the burden laid upon me, until my appointed time shall come, may I at length reach the wished-for haven of safety and of peace.