10. Selling All for the Pearl
chapter ten
Selling All for the Pearl
On August 27, 1990, at 6:10 a.m. my mother died. She was 84. Her last words were, “I am going to my Father’s house.” She loved the Lord deeply and walked closely with Him. Through her example she taught her six sons to love Jesus. Her 21 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren were also touched by her love for the Lord.
For as long as I can recall, Mother got up as early as four in the morning to read her Bible and pray. For hours she poured out her heart to her loving Father and found strength and encouragement in His Word. Then she woke up the rest of the family to say, “Time to pray!” Every morning we sat in a circle together, read our Bibles and prayed. I cannot remember a time that I did not see Mother during the morning hours with a Bible in her hands.
Clearly I remember the day she took me to a Gospel meeting. I was only 8 years old, but that day I gave my heart to Jesus.
Committing my life to serve the Lord at age 16 was a direct answer to my mother’s prayers, too. For three-and-a-half years she had fasted and prayed every Friday, asking the Lord to call one of her boys to become a missionary. And hardly a day went by that she herself did not visit several homes in my village to witness about the Lord.
I was on my way from India to South Korea to speak at a missions conference when she was admitted to the hospital with heart problems. I canceled my trip and stayed in India, visiting her daily, reading Bible verses and praying with her. As soon as I started reading a verse, she would finish it from memory. As she lay in her hospital bed she talked continually about Jesus.
The doctors, nurses and aides were all touched by her simple yet strong faith. “I am going home soon,” she would tell them. “I am so happy.”
The day before she died she took the hand of one of the young doctors who came to her bedside and told him, “You sit here and sing for me ‘When the Roll Is Called Up Yonder I’ll Be There.’ ”
The next morning my older brother phoned me to say that Mother had just passed away. She longed for her Father’s house and had finally gone home.
After her death her doctors told me they had never seen such peace or assurance in a dying person.
Then came the funeral, the saddest day of my life. But thousands of people attended whose lives she had touched.
It was my responsibility as the youngest son to go to the coffin just before it was closed and cover my mother’s face with a veil. My oldest brother sat at the foot of the coffin. As I lifted the veil, something struck me like lightning. I realized when I looked at her face that something was missing. It was her earring. I had never seen Mother without her earring. And the tiny gold chain that was the symbol of her marriage with my father—that was also missing from around her neck. And the ring on her finger that she always wore—it was gone, too.
There had been so much going on that I had not noticed these things until now, in the last few seconds that I would see her on this earth.
As I placed the veil over her face, one other thing stood out to me: Her Bible was not there.
After the coffin was closed, the crowd dispersed quietly and our family walked slowly home.
When we arrived home, my oldest brother, who now would handle our mother’s affairs after her death, took me aside. Ever since our father had died in 1974, I had looked to him as the head of our family, as is the custom in my native land. I asked his opinion in matters pertaining to our family and respected his wishes.
“I know you have to go overseas soon,” he said to me that afternoon. “But I thought you might like to know how much money Mother left in the bank.”
I was curious. I imagined there would be a good sum of money, because we six children had given her quite a bit over the years.
“I looked through all her records,” he told me, “and she has about two or three dollars left.”
“What?” I was astounded.
“Yes,” he replied. “And she also kept a record of what she did with her money.”
We had never known what she did with it. But I discovered that afternoon that over the years she had been sending her money faithfully to dozens of missionaries, Bible school students and others who were serving the Lord.
“Oh, and by the way,” my brother added, “she wanted her earring, her gold chain and her ring to be sold, and the money used for mission work among the unreached.”
I was quiet after I heard this information. This was not just another great illustration of a saint of God; this was my mother. It hit close to home and made me think a lot about my own life and priorities.
In chapter 4 we talked about giving our lives to God as living sacrifices. In these next chapters I want to provide an eternal perspective on our material goods—and our families as well.
We cling to many things in this world, as Kuttapan did, the beggar who clung to his rupee coin. But we will not carry them with us.
How to Buy the Pearl
Jesus compared the kingdom of heaven to “a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it” (Matthew 13:45–46).
Juan Carlos Ortiz, in his book Call to Discipleship, expands the story and gives us a better understanding of what absolute surrender—selling everything for the pearl—is all about.
When a man finds Jesus, it costs him everything. Jesus has happiness, joy, peace, healing, security, eternity. Man marvels at such a pearl and says, “I want this pearl. How much does it cost?”
The seller says, “It’s too dear, too costly.”
“But how much?”
“Well, it’s very expensive.”
“Do you think I could buy it?”
“Oh, of course. Anybody can.”
“But you say it’s too expensive. How much is it?”
“It costs everything you have—no more, no less—so anybody can buy it.”
“I’ll buy it.”
“What do you have? Let’s write it down.”
“I have $10,000 in the bank.”
“Good, $10,000. What else?”
“I have nothing more. That’s all I have.” “Have you nothing more?”
“Well, I have some dollars here in my pocket.”
“How many?”
“I’ll see: 30, 40, 50, 80, 100, 120—120 dollars.”
“That’s fine. What else do you have?”
“I have nothing else. That’s all.”
“Where do you live?”
“I live in my house.”
“The house too.”
“Then you mean I must live in the garage?”
“Have you a garage, too? That too. What else?”
“Do you mean that I must live in my car, then?”
“Have you a car?”
“I have two.”
“Both become mine. Both cars. What else?”
“Well, you have the house, the garage, the cars, the money, everything.”
“What else?”
“I have nothing else.”
“Are you alone in the world?”
“No, I have a wife, two children. ...”
“Your wife and children too.”
“Too?”
“Yes, everything you have. What else?”
“I have nothing else, I am left alone now.”
“Oh, you too. Everything. Everything becomes mine: wife, children, house, garage, cars, money, clothing, everything. And you too. Now you can use all those things here, but don’t forget they are mine, as you are. When I need any of the things you are using, you must give them to me because now I am the owner.”
What does it mean to give up everything for the pearl of great price?
The home of a close friend of mine has been broken into several times in the past few years. Most of the time, he told me, they found nothing worth stealing. The damage done to enter his home cost more than the theft itself.
“My main concern,” he told me, “was not for the house but for my family. I was just glad they weren’t at home when it happened. But after the last attempt I thought to myself, Why not put a note on the door saying, Please come in—the door is unlocked. Take all you want. There is really nothing to take!”
Then he laughed. “I found my imagination painting a picture of our house being dismantled by thieves or burning to the ground. And I was pleased and surprised by my reaction to the mental scenario. So what? I thought to myself. I’m not the owner; the Lord owns this house. Whether it’s torn apart or burned to the ground—no problem. Where will we sleep tomorrow night? That’s His problem.”
Giving up everything for the pearl of great price means even more than relinquishing material things. It means relinquishing loved ones, too.
One day as I sat in an airport terminal waiting for a connecting flight, I prayed to the Lord and agonized over the many opportunities on the mission field. I thought particularly of the millions of Muslims throughout the world and the immense challenge before us to reach them with the Gospel.
Suddenly it was as if I were taken away to another time and place. A voice said, Your son will finish high school and go to the mission field.
As I looked I saw Daniel in Iran, going door-to-door and passing out Gospel tracts. Then I saw him being arrested. He was pushed blindfolded up against a wall. Shots rang out and he slumped over, blood pouring from a fatal wound to his head. I saw myself at home hearing the news for the first time, in shock.
Then the voice asked me, Now what do you think?
Back in the airport terminal, the question would not go away. What did I think? What would I do with my son?
From the very beginning Gisela and I have always told our children, “When you finish your studies, you can go to the mission field.” Our children have always thought of their lives in terms of reaching the lost.
Now as I sat in the airport, I knew what my response would be. If Daniel went to Iran, distributed tracts door-to-door and was caught and killed, I could say only, “Praise the Lord. He did what God called him to do. He is not mine. My son belongs to the Lord.”
What Will You Leave Behind?
Do I write these stories and scenarios just to impress you or to fill up pages in a book? No, I want to convey from these illustrations that your choice to live for Jesus is not just a means to escape hell. It is not just to have your sins forgiven or to have a nice, comfortable life here on earth with good fellowship and a free ride to heaven.
We saw in chapter 8 that life for Jesus is a spiritual battleground. Like it or not, we are in the enemy’s territory. Jesus Himself was harassed continually by the powers of darkness and the enemies of the Gospel. He had no nice place to lay His head. He was misunderstood and rejected. He was often left alone, particularly at the hour of His greatest need. He died daily, and on the cross in great agony.
Paul and the other apostles followed in His footsteps.
Am I saying you are more spiritual if you walk around in rags and alienate yourself from society? No. And I do not want you to assume from what I am writing that giving up “rights” or comforts is all there is to life in Christ. Every truth in this world stretched beyond its limits will become a false doctrine. But when you commit yourself to live for Jesus, you cannot live just like everyone else. You must follow the Lord closely day by day. Only He can provide the balance you need. This is why we are told in the Word of God that “those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God” (Romans 8:14).
As we walk through this life, we can choose to be led by the Spirit, or we can choose to be led by our own logic, by other people’s opinions or by our own flesh. What led Mahatma Gandhi to live as he did, giving up everything to free India from colonial bondage? What led Gautama Buddha to walk away from his princely authority, his palace, his wife and child, and live as a monk for the rest of his life? It was not the Holy Spirit in either case.
Our flesh will do a lot of good-looking things—a lot of praying, a lot of fasting, a lot of giving up. But the Word of God says, “If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing” (1 Corinthians 13:3).
If we are not controlled and led by love for God (as we saw in the story of the older brother in chapter 6), all the “right” outward behavior amounts to nothing. Since love is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, we must be filled continually with the Holy Spirit and led daily by Him.
“What is your life?” asks James 4:14. “You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.”
Since your life is short, what will you leave behind?
My mother could not take her earring, her necklace, her ring, even her Bible, when she died. But the faith she instilled in the lives of her children, grandchildren and many others will live forever.
What will you leave behind? A few pieces of jewelry, a house, some cars, land, investments, money in the bank? Or will you leave more than that?
What about a son or daughter who is serving the Lord somewhere in the world? What about the memory that you lived for Jesus with all your heart—that you gave Him all you had and all you were to gain His kingdom? What about the knowledge that you gave all you could to reach the lost and dying souls of the world?
Jesus told His disciples the cost of the pearl of great price: “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me” (Matthew 16:24). May you find the willingness in your heart to sell all you have for the pearl.
In the next chapter I want to show you how it was that Jesus paid the price. His eyes were not focused on the cross; He was looking beyond it.