Chapter 8
8
SMALL HARD THINGS
How to do hard things that don’t pay off immediately
Joanna hung up the phone in shock. She had been counting down the days until the trip to Romania for months. Now her father had called to say the trip had been canceled.
“I was heartbroken,” Joanna told us later. “I felt as if I’d been pushed underwater without being able to catch a breath.”
That summer, instead of an exciting trip to Romania to share the gospel, Joanna found herself stuck at home in Tennessee. With her mother experiencing some serious health problems, and as the oldest child at home, Joanna was the one to head up meals, sort laundry, care for younger siblings, and clean.
It wasn’t exactly the summer she had planned. “It was hard,” Joanna said. “One of the hardest times of my life.”
Have you ever felt like Joanna? Ready and motivated to tackle something big and exciting but stuck against your will in a seemingly endless round of chores?
How do we reconcile the fact that there’s a big world out there to impact for God with the fact that we’re stuck at home matching socks in yet another load of laundry? What are rebelutionaries to make of all the small, seemingly insignificant things that take up so much time and energy? How do things like doing the dishes and writing lab reports for biology fit into “do hard things”?
Rebelutionaries have to think straight about this problem or we’ll get ambushed on our way to doing big hard things for God. And what’s more, we’ll miss out on the genuine significance and hidden benefits of what we like to call “small hard things.”
MENDING NETS AND GUTTING FISH
In Rudyard Kipling’s classic novel Captains Courageous, fifteen-year-old Harvey Cheyne, the son of a wealthy railroad tycoon, is washed overboard from a transatlantic steamship and rescued by fishermen.
Cold, wet, and forgotten for the first time in his spoiled existence, Harvey at first tries to convince the fishermen of his parents’ great wealth. He wants them to abandon their fishing season and take him ashore, where he promises his father will reward them generously. But his pleas don’t work. In the end he is forced to earn his keep mending nets and gutting fish.
At first Harvey can’t believe his bad luck. The backbreaking work, the long hours, the stench, and the cold and wet disgust and overwhelm him. But over time, Harvey mysteriously changes. His body toughens. He learns to use his hands and his head to perform the tasks and weather the trials of fishing on the open sea. He begins to actually enjoy the hardships and to admire the strength and intelligence of his new companions.
When the boat finally returns to port, Harvey wires his parents, who rush to the small town. Amazed, they find a transformed son. Their lazy, demanding boy has become an industrious, serious, and considerate young man. No longer needing or wanting his mother’s constant doting, Harvey is ready to start a successful career in his father’s shipping lines.
Maybe you feel forgotten and alone, grinding away at pointless routines that seem guaranteed to lead you nowhere. You feel like you have incredible potential, but it’s all going to waste.
The truth is that your life (both now and later) will require you to invest a lot of time and energy in things that aren’t big and that don’t seem to make much of an impact. Some days they don’t even make sense. Sometimes the smallest things can be the hardest things of all.
But in this chapter we’ll show you the big role that doing those small hard things can play for all of us—not just now but for the rest of our lives. We think you’ll learn what Harvey did: not only is it necessary to do small hard things, but they deliver incredible dividends in the life and future of every rebelutionary.
WHY SMALL GETS SO HARD
During our legal internship, we were surprised to find that the hardest things for us weren’t the projects we were given at the court. Sure, those things were difficult, but they were also usually exciting and important. The hardest things for us were the small things like keeping our room clean, going to bed on time, reading our Bible each morning, and staying in touch with our family.
You’ve probably experienced the same thing in your own life. For you it could be things like reading your Bible and praying. Maybe it’s doing family chores when (and how) your mom wants you to. Maybe it’s getting up on time, exercising regularly, or saying no to certain distractions or temptations. For us it has often been all of those things and more. Whatever they are for you, they’re not big things, but they’re hard.
Small things most often occur behind the closed doors of our homes, schools, or churches. They are rarely new or exciting, and they are often repetitive—even tedious. Small things happen on the level at which we normally live our lives. In fact, in the most basic sense they are our lives—the “stuff” that makes up everyday living. You won’t make it in the headlines for any of them (“Local Boy Cleans Bedroom and Does Homework!”) or wake up looking forward to them (“Oh boy! Today I get to obey my mom cheerfully!”).
We tried to figure out exactly why small hard things are so difficult. See if you agree with our top five reasons:
1. They don’t usually go away after you do them. “My bedroom doesn’t stay clean. The dishes don’t stay washed. Teeth don’t stay brushed. There’s always another test for school and another temptation to say no to. Over and over. Does it ever stop?”
2. They don’t seem very important. “Spending time with my little brother isn’t as important as raising money for orphans in Africa or volunteering for a political campaign. I’m supposed to do big things for God. This is a distraction.”
3. They don’t seem to make any difference. “In five years will it really matter whether I cleaned my room today? Or whether I drove the speed limit to work? Or whether I read my Bible this morning? How do I benefit from doing these things?”
4. They don’t seem very glamorous. “I don’t get any props for holding my temper with my dad. No one even knows. And now I’m cleaning the bathroom. It’s a gross and thankless job. Yuck. This is not what I signed up for.”
5. No one is watching. “Everyone’s impressed because she’s running a charity for cancer patients. No one knows or cares that I’m taking care of Grandma and studying for my SATs.”
Unfortunately, we tend to respond to these small hard things in not-so-rebelutionary ways. So besides naming five reasons small things are hard, we also came up with five ways we fail to do small hard things. See if you can recognize yourself in any of the following:
1. Procrastination. “Sure, I’ll take care of that—eventually. In just a minute. Right after I…Oh, look. It’s time for bed.”
2. Inconsistency. “Yeah, I read my Bible. In fact I just read it this morning. Of course I didn’t do it yesterday or the day before, but I did last Tuesday…I think.”
3. Compromise. “I’ll do it just this once. One time can’t hurt, right? Maybe just one more time. Then I’ll stop for good. Oh…Just one more time.”
4. Begrudging. “Okay, I’ll do it if I have to! Just don’t expect me to do it with a decent attitude.”
5. Cheating. “Look, I cleaned my room really well. At least if you don’t look in the closet, or under the bed, or in my dresser, or in my laundry hamper.”
Small things often seem routine, insignificant, and pointless. But are they?
We don’t think so. The evidence of wisdom, the Bible, history, and the experiences of people like Joanna show otherwise.
The truth is that huge gifts are often hiding in those small packages.
THE PLAN BEHIND THE PAIN
“God had a plan,” Joanna says, reflecting on her canceled trip to Romania and the summer spent taking care of her family. “And it was much better than mine. Had this never happened, I wouldn’t have learned how to cook better, help my younger siblings, or take care of things around the house. I can honestly say that I’m thankful for this trial, even though it was extremely hard.”
Like Harvey in Captains Courageous, Joanna learned that small things equip you for big things in the future. Habits like working hard, maintaining a positive attitude, living with self-discipline and integrity, and serving others bring benefits to our lives now and pay enormous dividends in the future—if we do them faithfully.
Take a careful look at the drudgery you’re stuck in today. If it’s making an effort to be kind to a sibling, you’re accomplishing at least two things: shaping your future relationship with that brother or sister and training yourself for how you will relate to your future spouse and co-workers. If you’re slogging through chemistry today, you’re affecting your academic future while also exercising and strengthening your brain to figure out complex situations later in life.
Doing hard things is how we exercise our bodies, our minds, and our faith. Small hard things are the individual repetitions—like a single push-up. They are seemingly insignificant by themselves but guaranteed to get results over time.
As you might expect, God cares a great deal about small things, and the Bible has a lot to say about them. In the gospel of Matthew, Jesus shares the Parable of the Talents. In this story, a nobleman gives each of his servants a certain amount of money (called “talents”) before leaving on a journey. When he returns, two of the servants report that they put his money to work and doubled what he’d given them. The master commends each of these servants, saying, “You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much” (25:21). The gospel of Luke tells us that the “much” he was talking about was entire cities. You couldn’t ask for a better promotion than that.
But the third servant—the one who did nothing at all with what he had been given—got rebuked. “You wicked and slothful servant!” his master said, and he had the lazy man thrown out into the street (Matthew 25:26). Even what he had was lost.
Another picture of small things in the Bible is in Galatians 6:7, where Paul writes, “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” Every action, no matter how small, is defining our future harvest. Small seeds can make big weeds, but they can also produce beautiful flowers or feed a nation.
But that’s where lazy servants (and many of us) get tripped up. We enjoy the harvest, but we don’t enjoy sowing and cultivating good seed. We enjoy being fit and strong, but we don’t enjoy exercise. We all want to do big and important things, but we tend to discount the equally important small things that get us there.
That’s where the “do hard things” mentality comes in. It reminds us that sometimes the smallest things can be the hardest things and that the purpose of effort is to gain strength. Being faithful in the smallest things is the way to gain, maintain, and demonstrate the strength needed to accomplish something great.
One of the best examples of this that we’ve found is the Vikings. And no, we’re not talking about the football team.
A LESSON FROM THE VIKINGS
The Vikings were fierce pirates and warriors who terrorized northern Europe nearly a thousand years ago. They looted and burned pretty much every European country that had the misfortune to border the Atlantic Ocean. Europeans were so frightened of the Viking menace that churches often offered a special prayer: “God, deliver us from the fury of the Northmen.”
Most historians attribute the Vikings’ devastating effectiveness to their warships, which were light enough to be dragged up onto the beach. That allowed the raiders to make lightning-fast strikes, then retreat quickly to the safety of the sea.
However, another contributing factor holds great significance for rebelutionaries: the Vikings rowed themselves to battle. Most other sea powers at that time used slaves or professional rowers to propel their warships, but the Vikings took full responsibility for that repetitive and strenuous activity. That tells us one very important thing about them: they were seriously ripped.
No wonder an entire continent lived in dread of them. By sheer muscle power, they routinely moved twenty-ton boats across miles of ocean. When they got out of their boats and started swinging their battle-axes, it didn’t matter if you carried a shield or barricaded your door. You stood little chance. The Vikings’ incredible upper-body strength made them nearly undefeatable.
We can all learn a lesson about small hard things from the Vikings. If we’re willing to strive for excellence, even in the boring, repetitive tasks and responsibilities that others delegate or neglect, we will reap the powerful benefits that others miss.
Embracing small hard things can make a radical difference.
CHECK, CHECK, CHECK!
“I’ve always been a procrastinator,” Katie, a high-school junior, admitted in a letter. “I thought I always would be a procrastinator. I thought that despite all my hopes and dreams I’d still fail.” Katie told us she avoided anything she didn’t want to do for as long as possible and routinely turned in school assignments late. “The dictionary defines a procrastinator as someone who ‘puts off intentionally and habitually the doing of something that should be done.’ That would be me,” she confessed.
For Katie, the turnaround moment came when she got an F in Algebra 2. That really woke her up. Suddenly she could see herself flipping burgers at a fast-food joint for a career. That’s when she decided to tackle her own very hard thing: procrastination.
“This time, I vowed, would be different. I chose my classes carefully. I got my priorities straight. I quit the volleyball team. I set my alarm clock. I made a schedule and stuck to it like glue. I didn’t want to give myself the chance to turn back.”
Several months after taking aim at her procrastination problem, Katie’s life has changed dramatically. Here’s how she describes her life now:
I’m not behind in anything. In fact, I’m ahead of schedule in a couple things. I just got an A on a history test last week. I had time to accept a regular baby-sitting job and participate in some extracurricular activities like debate and speech. I actually have time to sit down and write this story.
Overcoming my procrastination is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. That might seem trivial to you, but to me it is a thing of beauty. I am not useless. I still have a chance to pursue my dreams. Of course, I have to stay committed, but now that I know it’s possible, I am not about to go back to the way things were.
My assignment book has become my most priceless piece of work with all its beautiful markings: check, check, check!
What small hard things have popped into your mind as you’ve read the stories of Joanna, Harvey, Katie, and the Vikings? If you’re like us, there will always be certain tasks or responsibilities you want to overlook. We constantly have to remind ourselves that it really is of utmost importance to keep an eye on those areas where we tend to let things slide. Here are a couple of questions to help you do the same:
• Think of a regular or daily task you hate that takes less than five minutes a day. How do you most often deal with it? Procrastination? Inconsistency? Irritation? How might you benefit from a shift in attitude and a renewed commitment to this small thing?
• Do you have a big goal for your life that you can’t achieve without a commitment to small hard things? Write down your big goal. Then write out the small hard things that will help you achieve it—and how faithfully doing those small hard things now will help you achieve your dream later.
Remember, as you commit today to excellence, doing the small hard things God has given you, He will give you strength. Over time the tasks will get easier, and the benefits of doing them will become more and more obvious.
“HERE LIVED A GREAT STREET SWEEPER”
Now for a hard question: can we assign meaning to the simplest and humblest of acts? It’s not extremely difficult to recognize that the faithful practice of doing small hard things should be valued as vital preparation for future achievements, but are they significant in and of themselves?
Yes. Every job we do with sincere effort and the right attitude brings pleasure to God. In Colossians 3:23, Paul wrote, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men” (NIV). And in 1 Corinthians 10:31, he says it again: “Whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”
We love the way Martin Luther King Jr. addressed this issue for those in all walks of life:
If it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures, sweep streets like Beethoven composed music…. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and say: Here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well.
Like the street sweeper, your actions at home, at school, at church, and elsewhere in your community can bring honor and glory to God if you are willing to throw yourself into them 100 percent just because they’re things He has given you to do.
Take up your Viking challenge today to do small hard things. The fact that you face those unwanted tasks is not a mistake; it’s an opportunity. That’s why we encourage you to put your full weight into every stroke of the oar.
And because God is good, by doing what He has put before you with all your heart, regardless of whether it appears significant or not, you will find yourself benefited and strengthened, ready for the next big thing.