10: The Ideals That Propel the Unchurched Forward
THE IDEALS THAT PROPEL THE UNCHURCHED FORWARD
The Goals, Morals, and Values at the Heart of Churchless Adults
If we asked you to identify the single most important goal for your life, what would you say? When we asked a national sample of churchless people, the most popular responses were to experience good health (20 percent) and to succeed in their job or career (18 percent). Other frequently mentioned goals were to do a good job parenting their children (10 percent), to be financially successful or comfortable (10 percent), to live a long life (8 percent), and to experience happiness and fulfillment (5 percent). Only 2 percent listed goals related to faith or spirituality.
These responses are quite similar to those offered by churched adults. The only significant difference is the 12 percent of churched adults who listed a goal related to faith or spirituality. Among churchgoers, faith-related responses were the third-ranked category, marginally higher than parenting and finances. Still, fewer than one in eight churched people identify something related to faith as their top goal in life.
Americans no longer share a common dream. Just one in five Americans hopes to achieve good health, the most common goal for the future. The vast majority of goals maintained by Americans are personal, not communal, a pattern that holds true in responses from churched and unchurched adults alike.
The data presented in the following table provide a glimpse into the differences and similarities between churched and unchurched adults when it comes to ranking their hopes for the future. The results indicate that the churchless desire pretty much the same outcomes as the churched —without involvement in a church or in the Christian faith. They are less interested than churched people in marriage and children and in making a difference in the world, and less worried about grasping their purpose in life —yet purpose, impact, and family are still of significant interest to tens of millions of unchurched people.
Consider the top-ranked outcomes the unchurched desire: Good health. Good friends. A good marriage that provides sexual fulfillment. Integrity. Comfort. Purpose and meaning.
Next, look at the outcomes that are relatively unappealing to them: Pleasure travel. A big house. A high-paying job. The latest technology. Fame. A deep commitment to the Christian faith. Church involvement.
The Life American Adults Hope For
Desired outcomes for their future
Unchurched
Churched
Having good physical health
86%
84%
Living with a high degree of integrity
81
87
Having close personal friendships
73
75
Having a comfortable lifestyle
73
68
Having one marriage partner for life
72
84
Having a clear purpose for living
68
82
Having a satisfying sex life with your marriage partner
65
66
Living close to your family and relatives
56
66
Having children
54
71
Having a close relationship with God
52
86
Making a difference in the world
46
60
Having a college degree
42
48
Working in a high-paying job
30
28
Travelling throughout the world for pleasure
27
29
Being deeply committed to the Christian faith
24
77
Owning a large home
14
21
Being personally active in a church
13
61
Owning the latest household technology and electronics
12
11
Achieving fame or public recognition
7
7
A few outcomes fall within a middle ground —the “waffling zone” —composed of possibilities that do not get them excited, but that might fit into their framework given the right conditions: A dynamic personal relationship with God. Making a difference. Proximity to extended family. Having children. A college education.
{Insert table “The Life American Adults Hope For”}
When it comes to spiritual goals, those most interested are more often women, people in their fifties and sixties, blacks, born-again Christians, and those who live in red states. A noteworthy exception is the heightened interest in making a difference in the world among unchurched adults who are Hispanic or under the age of thirty.
Morals and Values
Ideologically, the unchurched are different from many who regularly attend church services. This distinctiveness emerges most clearly when we study morals and values.
Any discussion of morals must touch on the basis of those moral choices. For a disciple of Jesus, the Bible is, of course, the standard on which morals are based. But what about those who do not have a biblical foundation upholding their morality? On what basis do they make their moral choices?
Half of the nation’s unchurched adults make moral decisions based on their feelings about right and wrong. Another one-third (35 percent) say they do not know what it means for something to be “morally right,” so they just do the best they can in whatever situation they find themselves. Nearly one in ten churchless people (9 percent) turns to the Scriptures for moral guidance, while 3 percent rely on current societal standards. Churched people are more likely to rely on the Bible; 39 percent say they use it as their moral compass.
Two in ten unchurched (21 percent) believe absolute moral truth exists, yet just 17 percent of those (which equates to about 4 percent of the entire unchurched segment) believe the Bible is the source of absolute moral truth. A larger proportion would trust parental teaching (36 percent) or personal experiences (27 percent) than would rely on God’s Word.
Given their views on the relationship between moral authority and the Bible, it is easier to understand some of the moral stances the unchurched embrace. For instance, when asked about their views on abortion, seven out of ten say abortion should be legal in all (25 percent) or most (45 percent) cases. In contrast, only four in ten churched folks believe abortion should be legal: 11 percent in all cases, 29 percent in most.
Churchless adults are less inclined than the churched to believe that it is important to express their moral views to influence their community. One-third of the unchurched feel such an urge, compared to half of churched adults. Unchurched people are also less likely than churched people to allow their values to influence their media consumption; one-third say their morals and values affect their media exposure a lot, while half of the churched say so.
Reflections on Unchurched Ideals
Many unchurched adults believe that churches are more likely to have a predetermined agenda than to respond to the needs of congregants. Whether or not that perception is accurate, it serves to keep some from attending churches. Knowing what gets the unchurched excited for their future can help churches shape the experiences they offer.
In interactions with the unchurched, church leaders should consider how to downplay connecting with a church and instead emphasize the opportunity to bond with God. The life goals and moral perspectives of the unchurched clearly demonstrate their disinterest in church life —yet they do see value in spiritual depth and direction. A majority continue to believe that a meaningful relationship with God is worthwhile. Focusing on building that bridge is much more important, initially and eternally, than signing up another body for the membership count.
There’s no question that one of the great distinctives between the Christian life and a more secular approach relates to moral choices. However, churchless people are leery of churches that major on talk about morality and judgment. Certainly we cannot and should not change the essential moral component of the Christian life, but we must be aware that leading with the morality card closes down the conversation immediately. Most unchurched people are simply not interested in reflecting on their morals, reconsidering what is right or wrong, or hearing that there is a definitive source for knowing the difference. If they become followers of Christ, most unchurched adults will have to go through a massive overhaul on these matters, but transformation on that level usually comes in response to a relationship with Christ —not as a prerequisite.
• What surprises you most about churchless people’s goals and priorities? What surprises you most about churched people’s goals and priorities? What do you think could best account for the differences?
• Look again at the top five or six hopes shared by churched and unchurched people, as presented in the table “The Life American Adults Hope For.” What is your church community doing to help people make the connection between these goals and a life of faith?
• Is it possible for your church to hold biblical values and morals without compromising, while being open and inviting to unchurched people? How?