Part 24
I have often heard it from the mouth, arid found it in th a sweet Christian now with God, that a little before the Lore her dear husband by death, there was such an abundant the love of God unto her soul for several days and nights that when the Lord took away her husband by death, thou a gracious and sweet tempered (and by her most tenderly husband, she was scarce sensible of the stroke, but carried qi all earthly things, their comforts, and their troubles : so thi almost lost the thoughts of her dear husband in God. An( the Lord taken that course with her, she concluded that not been possible to be borne by her, she must have sun such a })reparative.
A husband, a wife, a child, are great, very great things, as i by other creatures ; but surely they will seem little things, to nothing, when the Lord shall set himself by them befori
And how knovv^ you, but God hath bidden these earthly stand aside this day, to make way for heavenly ones ? I
God is coming to communicate himself more sweetly, mor than ever to your souls ; and these are the providences w cast up, and prepare the way of the Lord. Possibly God' in their death is but this : child, stand aside, thou art ii: and flllest my place in thy parent's heart. Consideration 14. Be careful you exceed not in your gr loss of earthly ihhigs, considering that Satan takes the i of all extremes.
You cannot touch any extreme, but you will be touch< enemy, whose greatest advantages lie in assaulting you h(
Satan is called. The rider of the darTiuess of this Tcorlc 12. i. e. his kingdom is sup])orted by darkness. Now, thei fold darkness, which gives Satan great advantage ; the d the mind. viz. iffnorance : and the darkness of the co7id
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sired that the hand of God should have been stretched out upon . person, estate, and children, but that he promised himself a no advantage therein, to poison his spirit with vile thoughts of
Do this (saith he) and he will curse thee to thy face.'' What the Psalmist observes of natural, is as true of metaphc darkness, Psal. civ. 20. " Thou makest darkness, and it is n ** wherein all the beasts of the forest do creep forth, the young
" roar after their prey.'^ When it is dark night with men, it is noon-day with Satan ; our suffering-time is his busiest working-time ; many a dismal gestion he then plants, and grafts upon your affliction, whicl much more dangerous to us than the affliction itself.
Sometimes he injects desponding thoughts into the afflicted i
Then, said I, I am cut off from before thine eyes,"* Psal. xxxi and Lam. iii. 18, 19. " My hope is perished from the Lord, rei
" bering mv affliction, and my misery, the wormwood and the >
Sometimes he suggests hard thoughts of God, Ruth i. 20. " " Lord hath dealt very bitterly with me.'' Yea, that he hath more severely with us than any other. Lam. i. 12. " See am " hold, if there be any sorrow like unto my sorrow, which is " unto me, wherewith the Lord hath afflicted me in the day o " fierce anger.'' And sometimes murmuring and repining thoughts agains Lord ; the soul is displeased at the hand of God upon it. Jonal angry at the hand of God, and said, " I do well to be angry,
" unto death," Jon. iv. 9What dismal thoughts are these.'' how much more afflictive to a gracious soul, than the loss of outward enjovment in this world.
And sometimes very irreligious and atheistical thoughts, there were no privilege to be had by religion, and all our pains, and care about duty, were little better than lost labour, Psal. 1
13, 14. " Verily I have cleansed my heart in vain, and washe< " hands in innocency ; for all the day long I have Ijeen plac " and chastened every morning."
By these things Satan gets no small advantage upon the affl Christian ; for albeit these thoughts are his burden, and Goc not impute them to the condemnation of his people ; yet they ro soul of peace, and hinder it from duty, and make it act unco under affliction, to the stumbling and hardening of othei-s in sin : beware therefore, lest by your excess of sorrow ye give to the devil ; we are not ignorant of his devices.
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eyes are upon you. It is a true observation that a late author hath made upon this case : ' What will the Atheist, j
' will the profane scoffer say when they shall see this? ^ * and malicious they are, that if they do but see you in i ' they are straightway scornfully demanding, Wliere is yo
But what would they say, if they should hear you yours ' believingly cry out, Where is our God ? Will they not ' to cry, this is the religion they make such boast of, whicl ' how little it does for them in a day of extremity : they tal ' mises, rich and precious promises; but where are they i * to what purpose do they serve ? They said they had a tr ' heaven ; what ails them to mourn so then if their riches ai
O beware what you do before the world ; they have ey what you can do, as well as ears to hear what you can say : an as your carriage under trouble is so much like their own, never think your principles are better than theirs. Carnal w will be drawn to think, that whatever fine talk you might ht God and heaven, your hearts were most upon the same th theirs Avere, since your grief for their removal is as great a
They know by experience what a stay it is to the heart, t( able, faithful friend to depend upon, or to have hopes ol estate shortly to fall to them ; and they will never be persu have any such ground of comfort if they see you as much < as they that pretend to no such matter.
Ey this means the precepts of Christ to constancy and con in all estates, will come to be looked upon (like those oft] only as magnifica verba, brave words ; but such as are ii to be practised ; and the whole of the gospel will be take airy notion, since they that profess greatest regard to it, an helped thereby.
O what a shame is it that religion should, in this case, more difference betwixt man and man ! wherefore shew to (whatever their common censures are) that it is not so m care to diifer from them in some opinions, and a little strii in humility, meekness, contempt of the world, and heavenly ness ; and now let these graces display themselves by your patient deportment under all your grievances.
Wherefore hath God planted those excellent graces in yc but that he might be glorified, and you benefited by the ex them in tribulation : should these be suppressed and hid, am but the pride, passion, and unmortified earthliness of your
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I beseech you, therefore, Ije lender of the name of God, ii will not be so of vour own peace and comfort.
Consider. 16. Be qidet^ and held yotir peace^ you little Tcnoz many mercies lie in the roomb of this affliction.
Great are the benefits of a sharp, rousing affliction to the peo God at sometimes, and all might have them at all times, were more careful to improve them. Holy David thankfully ac!
ledgeth, Psal. cxix. 71. " It is good for me that I have been affli
And surely there is as much good in them for 30U, as for him ; Lord sanctify tiiem to such ends and uses as his were sanctified
Such a smarting rod as this came not before there was need er of it, and possibly you saw the need of some awakening provi yourselves; but if not, the Lord did : he took not up the 1 smite you, till his faithfulness and tender love to your souls upon him to correct vou.
You now sit pensive under the rod, ^dly lamenting and dep the loss of some earthly comfort ; your heart is surcharged wit row, vour eves run down upon everv' mention and remembrai your dear friend : whv, if there were no more, this alone may ver the need vou had of this rod ; for doth not all this sorr parting plainly speak how much your heart was set upon, ho' your heart was glewed to this earthly comfort ?
Now vou see that vour affections were sunk many degrees d into the creature, than you are aware of: and what should G in this case by vou ? Should he suffer you to cleave to the cr< more and more ? Should he permit it to purloin, and exhaust love and delight, and steal away your heart from himself? Tl could not do, and love you. The more impatient you are this affliction, the more need you had of it.
And what if bv this stroke the Lord will awaken your drowsy and recover vou out of that pleasant, but dangerous spiritual sli you were fallen into, whilst you had pillowed your head upo pleasant, sensible creature-enjoyment ? Is not this really beti you than if he should say. Sleep on : he is joined to idols, le alone ; he is departing from me, the fountain, to a broken cis let him go.
Yea, what if by this stroke upon one of the pleasantest thine had in this world, God will discover to you, more sensiblv and t ually than ever, the vanitv both of that and all earthly comfoi as that you shall from henceforth never let forth your heart, hope, your love, and delight to any of them, as you did be
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is rectified^ and your affections to all other enjoyments moderated : and is this nothing ? O doubtless it is a great to you, than to have your friend alive again.
And what if by this rod your wandering, gadding hearl whipped home to God ? your neglected duties revived ? cayed communion with God restored? a spiritual, heavei of heart recovered ? What will you say then ?
Surely you will bless that merciful hand which removei structions, and adore the Divine wisdom, and goodness, tha a device as this recovered you to himself. Now you can p constantly, more spiritually, more affectionately than be blessed rod, which buds and blossoms with such fruits as tl this be written among your best mercies, for you shall havi adore and bless God eternally for this beneficial affliction.
Consider. 17. Suffer not yourselves to be transported by in and sicallowed up of gricj\ because God hath exercised yo\ smart rod ; Jbr, as smarting as it is, it is comparativeh stroke to what others, as good as yourselves, have felt.
Your dear relation is dead ; be it so, here is but a sin before you, but others have seen many deaths contrived upon their relations, to which yours is nothing.
Zedekiah saw his children murdered before his eyes, and those eyes (alas two late) put out. The wort] The fulfilof that excellent book before-mentioned, tell ling of' the choice and godly gentlewoman in the north o Scriptures, who when the rebellion broke out there, three children, one of them upon the breast ; not gone far before they were stripped naked by the IrisV their admiration, spared their lives, (it is like, concluding and hunger would kill them) afterwards going on at the foot which runs to Lochneach, others met them, and would them into the river ; but this godly woman, not dismayet little liberty to pray, and as she lay naked on the frozen gi resolution not to go on her own feet, to so unjust a death, u] having called her, and she refusing, was dragged by the Y that rugged way, to be cast in with her little ones, and co
But she then turned, and on her knees says. You shoi sure, be Christians, and men I see you are ; in taking miserable lives, you do us a pleasure; but know, that as wronged you nor yours, you must remember to die alsoy and one day give an account of this cruelty, to the judge ar\(\ pnrth TTpvpiinnn thpv rpsnlvpd not to murder them
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goes by, unto whom she calls for God's sake to take tliem in, they being Irish, refused ; she desired a Httle bread, but they they had none ; then she begs a coal of fire, which she obtaii and thus, with some fallen chips, made a little fire, and thechil taking a piece of the hide laid it on the coals, and began to gnai leather ; but without an extraordinary Divine support, what c this do ?
Thus they lived ten davs, without any visible means of having no bread, but ice and snow, nor drink except water, two bovs being near starved, she pressed them to go out of her s not being able to see their death ; yet God delivered them as i culously at last, as he bad supported them all that while.
But judge whether a natural death, in an ordinary way be parable to such a trial as this ; and yet thus the Lord did bj choice and eminently gracious woman!
And Mr. Wall, in his None-hut-Christ, relates as sad a passag poor family in Germany, who were driven unto that extremity i famine, that at last the parents made a motion one to the oth sell one of the children for bread to sustain themselves, and the but when they came to consider which child it should be, their 1 so relented, and yearned upon every one, that they resolved r all to die together. Yea, we read in Lam. iv. 10. " The ban
" the pitiful women have sodden their own child I'en.''
But why speak I of these extremities .'' How many parents, some godly ones too, have lived to see their children dying in phaneness, and some by the hand of justice, lamenting their rebe with a rope about their necks.
Ah ! reader, little dost thou know what stings there are in t flictions of others ! surely you have no reason to think the Lord dealt more bitterly with you than any. It is a gentle stroke, a ciful dispensation, if you compare it with what others have fel
Consideration 18. If God be your God, you have really h, thingby the removal of any creature-comfort.
God is the fountain of all true comfort ; creatures, the ven and sweetest, are but cisterns to receive, and convey to us what fort God is pleased to communicate to them ; and if the ciste broken, or the pipe cut off, so that no more comfort can be con' to us that way, he hath other ways and mediums to do it by, ^ we think not of; and if he please he can convey his comforts people without any of them : And if he do it more immediatel shall be no losers by that ; for no comforts in the world are s
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Is the fulness of the fountain yours? and yet do yot yourselves, because the broken cistern is removed ; The be are no better, Jer. ii. 13. Cisterns have nothing but wl ceive, and broken ones cannot hold what is put into th then do you mourn, as if your life were bound up in th(
You have as free an access to the fountain as you had b( the advice of an Heathen, (and let them take the comfort pair, by a new earthly comfort, what we have lost in th(
" Thou hast carried forth him whom thou lovedst, (saitl
seek one whom thou mayest love in his stead : It is bett " than to bemoan thy loss."
But if God never repair your loss in things of the sam know he can abundantly repair it himself
Ah ! Christian, is not one kiss of his mouth, one glir countenance, one seal of his Sjiirit, a more sweet and subsl fort, than the sweetest relation in this world can afford y stream fail, repair to the fountain, there is enough still ; G he was, and what he was, though the creature be not.
Consideration ] 9. Though you may want a little comj life, yet surely it may be reco7npensed to you by a more
The removal of your friends before you may turn to advantage, when your hour is come that you must follov how have many good souls been clogged and ensnared in liour, by the loves, cares, and fears they have had about nuist leave behind them in a sinful, evil world !
Your love to them might have proved a snare to you, ; you to hang back, as loth to go hence ; for these are the make men loth to die. And thus it might have been wil cept God had removed them before-hand, or should give ^ day such sights of heaven, and tastes of divine love, as she and mortify all your earthly affections to these things.
I knew a gracious person, (now in heaven) who, for mar her last sickness, complained that she found it hard to f dear relation, and that there was nothing proved a grea her soul than this : It is much more easy to think of go friends, who are in heaven before us, than of parting with leaving our desirable and dear ones behind us.
And who knows what cares and distracting thoughts yoi be pestered and distracted with upon their account .'' Whj come of these when I am gone.-^ I am now to leave t knows to what wants, miseries, temptations, and afflicti)
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And some have been enabled cheerfully to do so when they \ parting trom them. * Luther could say, " Lord, thou hast g " me a wife and children, I have little to leave them ; noui
" teach, and keep them ; O thou Father of the fatherless,
Judge of the widow." But every Christian hath not a Lutl faith ; some find it a hard thing to disentangle their affections at i a time : But now, if God has sent all yours before you, you haA much the less to do ; death may be easier to you than others.
Consideration 20. But ij" nothing that hath been yet said uiU i "isith ymi^ then, lastly, remember that you are near that state, plaxe which admits no sorroics, nor sad rejlcctions, upon any accounts as these.
Yet a little while, and you shall not miss them, you shall need them, but you shall live as the angels of God : We now partly bv faith, partly by sense, partly upon God, and partly i tlie creature ; our state is mixed, therefore our comforts are so But when God shall be all in all, and we shall be as the ange] God in the way and manner of our living; how much will the be altered with us then, from what it is now ?
Angels neither marry, nor are given in marriage, neither shal children of the resuiTection ; when the days of our sinning are ed, the days of our mourning shall be so too. No graves were op till sin entered, and no more shall be opened when sin is exclu
Our glorified relations shall live with us for ever ; they shall i plain no more, die no more ; yea, this is the happiness of that to which you are passing on, that your souls being in the ne conjunction with God, the fountain of joy, vou shall have no cernment out of him. You shall not be put upon these exer of patience, nor subjected to such sorrows as you now feel, more. It is but a little while, and the end of all these things come. O therefore bear up, as persons that expect such a da jubilee at hand.
And thus I have finished the second general head of this disco which is a dissuasive from the sin of immoderate sorrow.
3. I now proceed to the third thing proposed, namely, to rei the pleas and excuses for this immoderate grief. It is natural to yea, to good men, to justify their excesses, or at least to extet them, by pleading for their passions, as if they wanted not cause reason enough to excuse them. If these be fully answered, an< soul once convinced, and left without apology for its sin, it is th a fair way for its cure, which is the last thins desicrned in this tre
654 A TOKEN roil MOURNERS.
Pica 1. You press me by many great considerations to and quiet submission under this heavy stroke of God ; bul know what stings my soul feels now in it.
The child was a child of many prayers, it was a Samuel the Lord, and I concluded when I had it, that it brought y returns and answers of many prayers. But now I see it \\t less ; God had no regard to my prayer about it, nor was il in that special way of mercy, as I imagined it to be : My c only dead, but my prayers in the same day shut out and
Answer 1. That you prayed for your children befort them was your duty ; and if you prayed not for them submis ferring it to the pleasure of God to give, or deny them, t( or remove them, as should seem good to him, that was your ought not to limit the Holy one of Israel, nor prescrib or capitulate with him, for what term you shall enjoy you comforts : If you did so, it was your evil, and God hath buked it by this stroke. If you did pray conditionally, ar sively referring both the mercy asked and continuance ( will of God, as you ought to do ; then there is nothing in of your child that crosses the true scope and intent in yo
Ansiver 2. Your prayers may be answered, though the tl ed for be with-held, yea, or though it should be given i while, and snatched away from you again. There are foi
God's answering prayers, by giving the thing prayed for Dan. ix. J23. or by suspending the answer for a time, an( afterwards, Luke xviii. 7. or by with-holding from you 1 which you ask, and giving you a much better mercy in th it, Deut. iii. 24. compared with Deut. xxxiv. 4, 5. Or, giving you patience to bear the loss, or want of it, 2 Cor.
Now, if the Lord have taken away your child, or frici lieu thereof given you a meek, quiet, submissive heart 1 you need not say he hath shut out your cry.
Plea. 2 But I have lost a lovely, obliging, and most endea one that was beautiful and sweet ; it is a stony heart that dissolve into tears for the loss of one so desirable, so er this was : Ah ! it is no common loss.
The more lovely and engaging your relatior more excellent will your patience and contentment with t God in its death be : the more loveliness, the more self-d more grace. Had it been a thousand times more endearir than it was, it was not too good to deny for God. If ther
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Answer SI. The loveliness and beauty of our children and relat though it must be acknowledged a good gift tVom the hand of ( yet it is but a common gift, and often times becomes a snare, ai in its own nature, but a transitory, vanishing thing, and thet no such great aggravation of the loss as is pretended.
I say, it is but a common gift ; Eliab, Adonijah, and Absalon as lovely presences as any in their generation. Yea, it is not common to the wicked, with the godly, but to the brute anima well as men, and to most that excel in it, it becomes a tempt a the souls of some had been more beautiful and lovely, if their c had been less so. Besides, it is but a flower which nourishes mouth, and then fades. This therefore should not be reflect as so great a circumstance to aggravate your trouble.
Ansicer 3. But if your relation sleep in Jesus, he will appef thousand times more lovely in the morning of the resurrection, ever he was in the world. What is the exactest, purest beat mortals, to the incomparable beauty of the saints in the resurrec " Then shall the righteous shine forth as the sun in the kingdi
" their Father," JMatth. xiii. 43. In this hope you part with i therefore act suitably to your hopes.
Plea 3. Oh ! but my child was nipped off by death in tlie bud ; I did but see, and love, and part : Had I enjoyed it lo and had time to suck out the sweetness of such an enjoyme could have borne it easier ; but its months or years with me W( few, that they only served to raise an expectation which was qui and therefore the more sadly disappointed.
Answer 1. Did your friend die young, or was the bond ol other relation almost dissolved as soon as made ? Let not this so intolerable a load to you ; for if you have ground to hope died in Christ, then they lived long enough in this world*. It is said, he hath sailed long enough that hath won the harboui hath fought long enough that hath obtained the victory ; he run long enough that hath touched the goal ; and he hath long enough upon earth that hath won heaven, be his days never so few.
Anszver 2. The sooner your relation died, the less sin hath committed, and the less sorrow felt : What can you see in this but sin or sorrow t A quick passage through it to glory is a s; privilege. Surely the world is not so desirable a place, that ( tians should desire an hour's time longer in it for themselv theirs, than serves to fit them for a better.
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drawn up by a single hand, but when it hath spread and root many years in the earth, it will require many a strong hard tug to root it up. Affections like those under-grou are fixed and strengthened by nothing more than consuc long-possession ; it is much easier parting now, than it hereafter, whatever you think. However, this should sa that God's time is the best time.
Plea 4. O but I have lost all in one, it is my only one, I left in its room to repair the breach, and make up the loss had given me other children to take comfort in, the loss been so great ; but to lose all at one stroke is insupportal
Anstoer 1. Religion allows not unto Christians a liberty sing the death of their dear relations by so hard a word as them is ; they are not lost but sent before you * : And it is ful thing for a Christian to be reproved for such an unc pression by a heathen ; it is enough to make us blush to an heathen said in this case-f-, ' Never say thou hast lost * (saith Epictetus) but that it is returned. Is thy son de; * onlv restored. Is thy inheritance taken from thee? It
turned.'' And a while after he adds, E/ rsro Seoi? ftXov r.
i. e. ' Let every thing be as the gods would have it.' Answer % It is no fit expression to say you have lost i except that one be Christ ; and he being once yours, car lost. Doubtless, your meaning is, you have lost all you; of that kind ; and what though you have .? Are there not r of comforts yet remaining, of a higher kind, and more pn durable nature ? If you have no more of that sort, yet you have better, what cause have you to rejoice !
Ansicer ii. You too much imitate the way of the woi complaint ; they know not how to repair the loss of one co by another of the same nature, which must be put in its r up the vacancy : But have you no other way to supply y Have you not a God to fill the place of any creature that le Surely this would better become a man whose portion is ii than one that professes God is his all in all.
Pica 5. O but my only one is not only taken away, but mains no expectation or probabiUty of any more : I must upon myself as a dry tree, never to take comfort in chi more, which is a cutting thought.
Answer 1. Suppose what you say, that you have no ho] pectation of another child remaining to you ; yet if you ha
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in his walls, a place and a name better than of sons and daugh
even an eveilasting name that shall not be cut off."" Ther better mercies, and higher hopes than these ; though your hop children, or from children, should be cut off, yet if your eternal I are secure, and such as shall not make you ashamed, you shoul( be so cast down.
Ansner 2. If God will not have your comforts to lie anv mc children, then resolve to place them in himself, and you shall i find cause to complain of loss by such an exchange : You will that in God which is not to be had in the creature ; one hour's munion with him, shall give you that which the happiest p never yet had from his children ; you will exchange brass for ; perishing vanity for solid and abiding excellency.
Pka 6. But the suddenness of the stroke is amazing, God little or no warning to prepare for this trial : Death execute commission as soon as it opened it. My dear husband, wife, or c was snatched unexpectedly out of my arms, by a surprizing str and this makes my stroke heavier than mv complaint.
Ansicer 1. That the death of your relation was so sudden surprizing, was much your own fault, who ought to have liv( the daily sense of its vanity, and expectation of your separation it ; you knew it to be a dying comfort in its best estate, and it such wonderful thing to see that dead, which you knew before dying : Besides, you heard the changes ringing about you in i famihes; you frequently saw other parents, husbands, and v carrying forth their dead : and what were all these but wan given to you to prepare for the like trials .?
Surely, then, it was your own security and regardlessness made this affliction so surprizing to you ; and who is to be bli for that, you know.
Answer 2. There is much difference betwixt the sudden dea infants, and that of grown persons ; the latter may have mucl) to do ; many sins actually to repent of, and many evidences of interest in Chiist to examine and dear, in order to their more fortable death ; and so sudden death may be deprecated by the
But the case of infants, who exercise not their reason, is fai ferent; they have no such work to do, but are purely passive: that is done in order to their salvation, is done by God immedi upon them ; so it comes all to one, whether their death be quick, or more slow.
AnsTcer 3. You complain of tlie suddenness of the stroke :
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" soul ? Which long for death, but it cometh not, anc " more than for hid treasures; Which rejoice exceedin *' glad when they can find the grave." That which you reckon the sting of your affliction, c have reckoned a favour and privilege. How many ten and other relations, who loved their friends as dearly as have been forced to their knees, upon no other errand beg the Lord to hasten the separation, and put an end to
to them was much greater than the sorrow for th
Plea 7. You press me to moderation of sorrows, an ought to shew it ; but you do not know how the case star there is a sting in this affliction, that none feels but mys( how intolerable is it now ! I neglected proper means : preserve life, or miscarried in the use of means. I now neglect, or such a mistake about the means, as I canno greatly to contribute to that sad loss which I now, too 1
O my negligence, O my rashness, and inconsiderat doth my conscience now smite me for my folly ! and b^ vate my burden beyond what is usually felt by others. H ably applied myself to the use of proper means, and kej such courses and counsels as those that are able and si have prescribed, I might now have had a living husba child : whereas I am now not only bereaved, but am ap have bereaved myself of them. Surely there is no sorrc my sori'ow. Answer 1. Though it be an evil to neglect, and sligh ordained by God for recovery of health, yet it is no ascribe too much to them, or rely too much on them ? tlu in the world are weak and ineffectual, without God's ass concurrence, and they never have that his assistance or c when his time is come ; and that it was fully come in y case, is manifested now by the event. So that if your had the most excellent helps the world affords, they ^ availed nothing. This consideration takes place only in who see what the will of God is by the issue, and may noi by any whilst it remains dubious and uncertain, as it gen( in time of sickness.
Ansxcer 2. Do you not unjustly charge, and blame yo that which is not really your fault, or neglect ! How i chargeable in this case, will best apjiear by comparing, stances you are now in, with those you were in when yc
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Or, if divers methods and courses were prescril)ed, and persu; to, and you now see your error, in preferring that which was i improper, and neglecting what was more safe, and prohable ; y long as it did not so appear to your understanding at that time, you followed the best light you had to guide you at that tim were most unjust to charge the fault upon yourselves, for choc that course that then seemed best to you, whether it were so in it or not.
To be angry with yourselves for doing, or omitting wliat was done, or omitted, according to your best discretion, and judgm because you now see it by the light of the event, far otherwise 1 you did heiore ; it is to be troubled that you are but men, or that are not as God, who only can foresee issues and events ; and you acted as all rational creatures are bound to do, according tc light they have, at the time and season of action.
Answer S. To conclude, Times of great affliction are ordin£ times of great temptation, and it is usual with Satan then to ch; us with more sins than we are guilty of, and also make those th to be sins, which, upon impartial examination, will not be foun be so.
Indeed, had vour neglect or miscarriage been known or volunt or had you really preferred a little money (being able to give before the life of your relation, and did deliberately choose to ha/ this, rather than part with that ; no doubt, then, but there had I much evil of sin mixed with your affliction ; and your consci( raay justly smite you for it, as your sin ; but in the other case, wl is more common, and I presume yours ; it is a false charge, and ought not to abet the design of Satan in it.
Judge by the sorrow you now feel by your friend, in what de| he was dear to you, and what you could now willingly give to i som his life, if it could be done with money. Judge, I say, by t how groundless the charge is that Satan now draws up against y and you are but too ready to yield to the truth of it.
Plea 8. But my troubles are upon a higher score, and accou ray child or friend is passed into eternity, and I know not how i with liis soul ; were I sure my relation were with Christ, I sho be quiet; but my fears of the contrary are everwhelming ; O i terrible to think of the damnation of one so dear to me.
Answer 1. Admit what the objection supposes, that you have i grounds to fear the eternal condition of your dear relation ; yet i utterly unbeseeming you, even in such a case as this, to dispute wi nr rpninp acpflinst thp T,nrd.
660 A TOKEN FOR MOURNERS.
First, His indisputable sovereignty over them, R " Who art thou^ O man, who disputest with God ?" 1 the matters of eternal election and reprobation. What will not be gracious to those that are so dear to us ? ' wrong done to them or us thereby ? Aaron's two sons in the act of sin, by the Lord's immediate hand, and yet peace, Lev. x. 3. God told Abraham plainly, that t should not be established with Ishmael, for whom he prayed, 0 let Ishmael live hefore thee ! and he knew th no salvation out of the covenant, and yet he sits down the word of the Lord.
Secondly, But if this do not quiet you, yet methinks his ing love and mercy to you should do it. O what do God, that root and branch hath not been cast together i that the Lord hath given you good hope, through gract be well with you for ever. Let this stop your mouth your spirit, though you would have grounds for this fe;
Atuiver 2. But pray examine the grounds of your f( it may not proceed from the strength of your affections t
of your friend, or from the subtilty of Satan, de; by to overwhelm and swallow you up in supposed, as just grounds and causes ? In two cases it is very probal may proceed only from your own affection, or Satan's t First, If your relation died young, before it did any stroy your hopes. Or,
If grown, and in some good degree hopei did not in life, or at death, manifest, and give eviden with that clearness as you desired.
As to the case of infants in general, it is none of on judge their condition ; and as for those that sprang fron parents it becomes us to exercise charity towards then ture speaks very favourably of them.
And as for the more adult, who have escaped the poll world, and made conscience of sin and duty, albeit thej fested what you could desire they had ; yet in them,
Abijah, " may be found some good things toward the ] you never took notice of. Reverence of your authority, and shame-facedness, reservedness of disposition, and things, may hide those small and weak beginnings of ^ in children, from the observations of the parents. G( that in them that you never saw ; he despiseth not the things.
A TOKEX FOR MOrRXEUS. ( much upon it, I even idolized it, that was my sin : and, saith anotl I wanted due affections, and did not love my relation, at least nol spiritually as I ought ; that was my sin. Now God is visiting me all the neglects and defects that hath been in me towards my relati
Ansiccr 1. There is no man so thoroughly sanctified, as not to f and come short in many things pertaining to his relative duties : i to speak, as the thing is, the corruptions of the holiest persons as much discovered in this, as any other thing whatsoever ; an( is a very common thing for conscience, not only to charge th failures upon us, but to aggravate them to the utmost when G hath made the separation. So that this is no more than what usual, and very common with persons in your case.
Jnszcer 2. Admit that which the objection supposes, that C had afflicted vou for your sin, and removed that comfort from y which you idolized, and too much doted on ; yet there is no rea you should be so cast down under your affliction : For all this n be, and probably is the fruit of his love to, and care of your sc
Rev. iii. 19. He tells the afflicted, for their comfort, " Whoi " love, I rebuke and chasten." How much better is it to have idolized enjoyment taken from you, in mercy, than if God sho say concerning you, as he did of Ephraim, Hos. iv. IT. " H< " joined to idols, let him alone." O it is better for you that your Father now reckons with you your follies with the rod in his hand, than to say as he doth to so let them go on, 1 will not hinder them in, or rebuke them for tl sinful courses ; but will reckon >vith them for all together in hel last.
Answer 3. And as to what you now charge upon yourself, that neglect of duty did spring from the want of love to your relati your sorrow at parting may evidence that your relation was roc deep in your affection ; but iY your love was not so spiritual pure, to love and enjoy them in God; that was undoubtedly y sm, and is the sin of most Christians, for which both you, and others, ought to be humbled.
Pha 10. God hath blessed me with an estate, and outward c forts in the world, which I reckoned to have left to my poster!
and now I have none to leave it with, nor have I any comfort to tl of it ; the purposes of my heart are broken off, and the comfor all my other enjoyments blasted by this stroke in an hour. I are the pains and cares of many years perished.
Ansxver 1. How many are there in the world, yea, of our owr
662 A TOKEN FOR MOL'RlNERS.
children left in the world, whose bowels you may refresh he hath bestowed upon you ; and your charity to them less turn to a more considerable account, than if you had estate to your own posterity.
Surely we are not sent into this world to heap up g for our children : and if you have been too eager in this c may now read God's j ust rebuke of your folly. Bless Gc yet an opportunity, to serve him eminently by your cl
God deny you other executors, let your own hands be youi to distribute to tlie necessity of the saints, that the blessir that are ready to perish may come upon you.
Plea 11. O but the remembrance of its witty words actions, is wounding.
Anszoer 1. Let it rather lift up your hearts to God in gave you so desirable a child, than fill your heart with d his hand in removing it. How many parents are there i whose children God hath deprived of reason and unders that they only differ from the beasts in external shape t And how many shew betimes so perverse a temper, thai fort can be expected from them.
Anszoer 2. These are but small circumstances, and tr in tliemselves; but by these little things Satan manag design against your soul, to deject or exasperate it : And is not your business at this time ; you have greater thin; words and actions of children to mind ; to search out G< the affliction, to mortify the corruption it is sent to rebu] your hearts in the will of God ; this is your work.
Pica 12. Lastly^ It is objected, O but God hides his fe in my affliction ; it is dark within, as well as without, anc my case more deplorable, greatly afflicted, and sadly des
Anszver 1. Though you want at present sensible comf have reason to be thankful for gracious supports. Thou of God's countenance shine not upon you, yet you find 1 ing arms arc underneath you ; the care of God worke when the consolations of God are withdrawn from you.
A7i8zver 2. To have God hide his face in the time of ti new or unusual thing; God's dearest saints, yea, his owi experienced it, who in the deeps of inward and outwa when wave called unto wave, felt not those sweet, sensib] of comfort from God, which had always filled his soul fo
Christ cry in extremity, " My God, my God, why hast tli " me !" Then sure we need not wonder, as if some st
A TOKEN FOR MOURNERS.
Father hath given you to drink; accept the punishment of j iniquities ; say, Good is the word of the Lord, It is the Lord. Iiim do what he will : You would soon find the case altered with y but the comfortuig spirit finds no delight, or rest, in a turbu and tumultuous breast
And thus I have satisfied the most considerable pleas urged justification of our excesses.
4. I come now to the last thing proposed, namely, the mean curing and preventing these sinful excesses of sorrow for the d( of our dear relations.
And, although much hath been said already to dissuade from evil, and I have enlarged already much beyond my first intenti vet I shall cast in some firthcr help and assistance to'.vards the 1: ing of this distemper, by prescribing the following rules :
Rule 1. If you icould not mourn excessively Jhr the loss qfc ture-coniforts, then bercare that you set not your delight and love cessively, or inordinately upon them, zihilst you do enjoy them.
Strong affections make strong afflictions ; the higher the tide lower the ebb. According to the measure of our delight in the joyment, is our grief in the loss of these things. The apostle k these two graces, temperance and patience, together in the prec 2 Pet. i. 16. and it is very observable how intemperance and in tience are inseparably linked in experience, yea, the experi< of the best men. You read. Gen. xxxvii. 3. " Now Israel Ic
" Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of
old age ; and made him a coat of many colours."' This was the darhng ; Jacob's heart was so exceedinglv set u liim, his verv life was bound up in the life of the lad. Now \< the supposed death of the child was brought to him, how did he c; it ! See ver. 34, 35. " And Jacob rent his clothes, and put s " cloth upon his loins ; and mourned for his son many days : j " all his sons, and all his daughters, rose up to comfort him, bu " refused to be comforted. And he said, for I will go down into
" grave to my son mourning. Thus his father wept for him.'' Here, as in a glass, are the effects of excessive love to a c represented : Here you may see what work immoderate love make, even in a sanctified heart.
O therefore let your moderation be known to all men, in -^ delight and sorrows about earthly things ; for ordinarily the pro tion of the one is answerable to the other.
Rule 2. If you xcould not he overwhelmed icith grief Jbr the nfumir rplnt'innM. hr p.rnrt nnA rnrcfnl. in iliarlinrtrinfr iimn- /Ji i I »
664 A TOKEN FOR MOUUNERS.
affliction, as the guilt charge^ upon us in times of affli( makes our load so heavy.
O what a terrible thing is it to look upon our dead friei conscience is accusing and upbraiding us for our duties and such or such sins committed ? O you little think ho^ a spectacle this will make the dead body of thy friend to
Conscience, if not quite stupid or dead, will speak at si O therefore, as ever you would provide for a comfortable death, or meet again at judgment ; be exact, punctual, ai spect, in all your relative duties.
Rule 3. If you would not be overwhelmed hy trouble^ J of dear relations, then turn to God under your troubk, out your sorrows, by "prvyer^ into his bosom.
This will ease and allay your troubles. Blessed be God dinance of prayer ; how much arc all the saints beholden 1 times, but especially in heart-sinking and distressful tin some relief, when in distress, we can pour out our troub] bosom of a wife, or faithful friend ; how much more whei our complaint before the gracious, wise, and faithful Gc you before of that holy man, who having lost his dear anc got to his closet, there poured out his soul freely to the ] when he came down to his friends that were waiting below him, and fearing how he would bear that stroke, he cam* duty with a cheerful countenance, telling them he would to bury a son, if it were possible every day, provided he ra such comfort as his soul had found in that private hour.
Go thy way. Christian, to thy God, get thee to thy ki cloudy and dark day ; retire from all creatures, that th have thy full liberty with thy God, and there pour out thj fore him, in free, full, and broken-hearted confessions of si thyself worthy of hell, as well as of this trouble ; justify his smartest strokes ; beg him, in this distress, to put unde lasting arms ; intreat one smile, one gracious look, to enli darkness, and cheer thy drooping spirit. Say with the pn xvii. 17. " Be thou not a terror to me ; thou art my hope
of evil." And try what relief such a course will afford thi ly, if thy heart be sincere in this course, thou shalt be able 1 that holy man, Psalm xciv. 29. " In the multitude of m^ •' which I had within me, thy comforts have delighted m Rule 4. If you would bear the loss of your dear relaiim deration, eye God in the whole jjrocess qftfie affliction mo rnndnni ciiiinpn and. rimimatmircs of the matter less.
A TOKEN FOR MOURNERS.
Secondly, As a father's hand correcting thee in love and faith ness. Prov. iii. 11. "Whom the Lord loveth he correcteth,
father the son in whom he delighteth.'^ O if once you could see aflSiction as a rod iu a father's hand, proceeding from his love, intended for your eternal good ; how quiet would you then be i
And surely if it draws your heart nearer to God, and mortifi more to this vain world, it is a rod in the hand of special love: If it in vour love to God, doubt not but it comes from God's love to _ Thirdly^ As a just and righteous hand. Hast not thou proci this to thyself by thy own folly .'' Yea, the Lord is just in all th come upon thee ; whatever he hath done, yet he hath done the vvrong.
Fourthly, Lastly, as a moderate and merciful hand that ] punished thee less than thine iniquities deserve : He that hath thee into affliction, might justly have cast thee into hell. It i the Lord's mercy that thou art not consumed. Why doth the li man torapiain .'*
Rule 5. If ycnc Kill hear your affliction xvith moderation, < pare it zcith the afflictions of other men, and that xvill greatly 5 your spirits.
You have no cause to say God hath dealt bitterly with you, that there is no sorrow like your sorrow : Look round about and impartially consider the condition that others are in ; and nothing inferior to you in any respect. You had one dear ch Aaron had two at a stroke. Job all at one stroke ; and both thes an immediate stroke from the hand of God. Some godly par have lived to see their children die in their sin by the hand of jus others have seen them live to the dishonour of God, and breakin their own spirits, and would have esteemed it a mercy if they had from the womb, and given up the ghost when they came out oi belly, as Job speaks.
In what misery have some parents seen their children die ! holding them as so many terrible spectacles of misery before 1 eyes ; so that they begged the Lord, with importunity, to let 1 his hands, and cut them off; death being in their esteem, nothii those continual agonies in which they have seen them lie welte from day to day. O you little know what a bitter cup others 1 given them to drink ? Surely, if you compare, you must say,
Lord hath dealt gently and graciously with me.
Rule 6. Carefully shun and avoid whatsoever may renew ; sorro'ic, or provoke you to impatience.
I I I
6C6 A TOKEN FOfi MOURNERS.
his trouble for the loss of his dear wife ; but he calL Benjamin.
Your impatience is like tinder, or gunpowder, so louj prevent the sparks from falling on it, there is no great you that carry such dangerous prepared matter in your cannot be too careful to prevent them. Do by murmu do by blasphemous thoughts ; think quite another way, occasion.
Rule 7. In the day of your murmuring for the dt Jriends^ seriously consider your oxvn death as approacM you and your deadji'iend are distinguished by a small point of time. 2 Sam. xi. 13. 1 shall go to him. Surely of your own death, as approaching also, will greatly all rows for the dead that are gone before you.
We are apt to fancy a long life in the world, and the those comforts which we promised ourselves so much oft and comforts of our lives from, seems an intolerable th
But would you realize your own deaths more, you v so deeply concerned for their deaths as you are. Co look into your own graves more seriously, you would be into your friend's grave more composedly. And thus I have finished what I designed from this scr Father of mercies, and God of all comforts, whose sole it is to comfort them that are cast down, write all his your hearts, that they may abide there, and reduce you affections to that frame which best suits the will of God, fession you make of subjection and I'esignation thereun
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