Sum Of Commandment 5.
SUM OF COMMANDMENT 5.
Evan. By father and mother is meant, not only natural parents, but also others who are our superiors either in age, position, or gifts, 2Kings 5.13; and 6.21; and 13.14.
Neo. Why did the Lord use the name “father and mother” to signify and comprehend all other superiors?
Evan. Because the government of fathers is the first and most ancient of all others; and because the society of father and mother is that from which all other societies come.
Neo. And are only the duties of inferiors towards their superiors intended here?
Evan. No, but also of superiors towards their inferiors, and of equals among themselves. So that the general duty required in the affirmative part of this fifth commandment, “Honour your father and your mother,” etc., is that every man, woman, and child, should be careful to carry themselves as becomes them in regard to that order which God has appointed among men, and in regard to that relation which they have to others, either as inferior, superior, or equal.
Neo. I ask you, sir, proceed to the particular handling of these things. But first tell us, what is the duty of children towards their parents?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that children reverence their parents by thinking and esteeming highly of them. Gen. 31.35; and by loving them dearly. Gen. 46.29; and by fearing them in regard of their authority over them, Lev. 19.3. And this inward reverent esteem of them is to be expressed by their outward reverent behaviour towards them. Gen. 48.12. And this outward reverent behaviour is to be expressed in giving them reverent titles. Gen. 31.35, and by bowing their bodies before them, 1Kings 2.19, and by embracing their instructions, Prov. 1.8, and by submitting patiently to their corrections, Heb. 12.9, and by their succouring and relieving them in case of want and necessity. Gen. 47.12, and by making their prayers to God for them, 1Tim. 2.1, 2.
Neo. And, sir, what are the duties of parents towards their children?
Evan. Why, in this commandment the Lord requires that parents be careful that their children, with all convenient speed, and in due order, are admitted into the visible church of God by baptism, Luke 1.59; and that according to their ability, they yield and give their children such adequate food, clothing, and other necessities, as are fit for them, Mat. 7.9, 12; 1Tim. 5.8.
And that they train them up in learning, instruct them in religion, and endeavour to sow the seeds of godliness in their hearts as soon as they are able to speak, and to use reason and understanding, Deu. 4.10; and 6.7, 20, 21. And that they are careful to check and rebuke them when they do amiss, Prov.31.2; and that they are careful to seasonably correct their faults, Prov. 13.24; and 19.18; and that they are careful in time to train them in some honest calling, Gen. 4.2; and that they are careful to give them in marriage in due time, Jer. 29.6; 1Cor. 7.36, 38; and that they are careful to save up something for them, as their ability allows, Prov. 19.14; 2Cor. 12.14; and that they are earnest with God in prayer, for a blessing on their children’s souls and bodies. Gen. 48.15, 16.
Neo. And what are the duties of servants towards their masters?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that servants have an inward, high, and reverent esteem of their masters, Eph. 6.5-7; yes, and that they have in their hearts a reverent awe and fear of them, 1Pet. 2.18; and they are to express this reverence and fear by their outward reverent behaviour towards them, both in word and deed, as by giving them reverent titles, 2Kings 5.23, 25, and by a humble, submissive countenance and carriage, either when their masters speak to them, or when they speak to their masters, Gen. 24.9; Acts 10.7; and by yielding sincere, faithful, willing, painful, and single-hearted service to their masters in all they go about doing, Col. 3.22; Tit. 2.10; and by a meek and patient bearing of those checks, rebukes, and corrections which are given to them, or laid upon them by their masters, without a grudging stomach, or a sullen countenance, even though the master does it without just cause, or in excessive measure, 1Pet. 2.18, 20; and by being careful to maintain their master’s good name, in keeping secret those honest intents which he does not want disclosed; and as much as possible, to hide and cover their master’s wants and infirmities, not publishing them abroad, 2Sam. 15.13; 2Kings 6.11.
Neo. And what is the duty of masters towards their servants?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that masters be careful to choose for themselves religious servants, Psalm 101.6; and that they instruct them in religion and the ways of godliness. Gen. 18.19; and that they be careful to bring them to the public exercises, Joshua 24.15; and that they pray with them and for them daily, Jer 42.4; and that they yield and give them food, drink, and apparel fitting for them, Deu. 24.14, 15; and that they see that they follow the works of their callings with diligence, Prov. 31.27; and that they be careful to instruct them, and give them direction in it, Exo. 35.34; and that they are careful to give them just reproof and correction for their faults, Prov. 29.19; and care for them when they are sick. Matt. 8.5, 6.
Neo. And what is the duty of wives towards their husbands?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that wives carry in their hearts an inward opinion and esteem for their husbands, Eph. 5.33; which they are to express in their speech, by giving them reverent titles and terms, 1Pet. 3.6; and in their countenance and behaviour, by their modesty, reserve, and sobriety, 1Tim. 2.9; and in being willing to yield themselves to be commanded, governed and directed by their husbands in all things honest and lawful. Gen. 31.4, 16, 17; 2Kings 4.22; and they are also required to love their husbands. Tit. 2.4, and to express their love by their chastity and faithfulness to their husbands, both in body and mind. Tit. 2.5; 1Tim. 3.11; and by using the best means they can to keep their husbands’ bodies in health, Gen. 27.9. They are also required to be helpful to them in the government of the family, and to be provident for their estate, by exercising themselves in some profitable employment, Prov. 31.13, 15, 19; and they are also required to stir up their husbands to good duties, to join with them in the performance of them, 2Kings 4.9, 10; and to pray for them, 1Tim 3.11.
Neo. And what is the duty of husbands towards their wives?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that husbands be careful to choose religious wives, 2Cor. 6.14; and that they dwell with them as men of knowledge, 1Pet. 3.7; and that they cling to them with true love and affection of heart, Col. 3.19; yes, and that they content themselves only with the love of their own wives, and keep themselves only to them both in mind and body, Prov. 5.19, 20; they are also to be careful to maintain their authority over them, Eph. 5.23; and to live cheerfully and familiarly with them, Prov. 5.19; and to be careful to provide all “things necessary and fitting for their maintenance,” 1Tim. 5.8; and to teach, instruct, and admonish them, as touching the best things, 1Sam. 1.8; and to pray with them and for them, 1Pet. 3.7; and to endeavour to reform and amend what they see amiss in them, by seasonable and loving admonition and reproof. Gen. 30.2; and to bear with their natural infirmities wisely and patiently, Gal. 6.2.
Neo. And what is the duty of subjects towards their MAGISTRATES?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that subjects reverently think about and esteem their magistrates, 1Sam. 18.30; and carry in their hearts a reverent awe and fear of them, Prov. 24.21; which they are to express by their outward reverent behaviour towards them, both in word and deed, 2Sam. 9.6, 8; and by humbly, readily, and willingly submitting themselves to their commands, either to do them or allow them, 1Pet. 2.13; and by yielding a loyal and sound-hearted love to them, in not shrinking from them when they have need, but defending them with their goods, bodies, and lives, if occasion requires, 2Sam. 18.3, and 2.27; also they are required to make their prayers to God for them, 1Tim. 2.1, 2.
Neo. And what is the duty of magistrates towards their SUBJECTS?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that magistrates be careful to establish good laws in their kingdoms, and good orders among their subjects, 2Kings 18.4; Rom. 12.17; and be careful to see them duly and impartially executed, Jer. 38.4, 6; Rom. 13.3, 4; and that they be careful to provide for the peace, safety, quietness, and outward welfare of their subjects, Rom. 13.4; 1Tim. 2.2, and not oppress them with taxations and grievances, 1Kings 12.14.
Neo. And what duties are people to perform towards their MINISTER?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that the people hold their minister in reverent regard and estimation, 1Cor. 4.1; and humbly and willingly yield themselves to be taught and directed in their spiritual affairs by him, Heb. 13.17; and pray for him, that the Lord would enable him to do his duty, Rom. 15.30, 31; and do their best to defend him against the wrongs of wicked men, Rom. 16.4; and yield double honour to him, that is, both singular love for their work’s sake, and sufficient maintenance, both in regard to his person and his calling, 1Tim. 5.17, 18; Gal. 4.15.
Neo. And what is the duty of a minister towards the PEOPLE?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that ministers diligently and faithfully preach the pure word of God to their people, both in season and out of season, 1Cor. 9.16; 2Kings 4.2; and that they so truly and plainly expound it, that the people may understand it; and that they pour out their souls to God in prayer, for the spiritual good of the people, 1Thess. 1.2; and go before the people as a pattern of imitation to them, in all holiness of conduct Phil. 4.9.
Neo. And what is the duty of EQUALS?
Evan. Why, the Lord in this commandment requires that equals regard the dignity and worth of each other, and carry themselves modestly towards one another, and in giving honour to one before another, Eph. 5.21; Rom. 12.10. And thus having shown you the duties required in this commandment, I ask you, Nomologista, to tell me whether you think you have kept it perfectly, or not?
Nom. Sir, though I have not kept it perfectly, yet I am persuaded thta I have gone very near it; for when I was a child, I loved and reverenced my parents, and was obedient to them; and when I was a servant, I reverenced and feared my master, and did him faithful service; and since I became a man, I have, I hope, carried myself well towards my wife, and towards my servants; yes, and done my duty both to magistrates and ministers.
Evan. Good, but I must tell you that the Lord not only requires you to do them, but also that you do them in obedience to him; that is, in conscience to God’s commandment, or for his sake, specifically because he requires it. Therefore although you did your duty to your parents when you were a child, and to your master when you were a servant, yet if you did it either for the praise of men, or for fear of their corrections, or to procure a greater portion or greater wages, and not because the Lord says in Eph. 6.4, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord;” and because he says to servants, “Whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not to men,” you have not in this kept this commandment. And though you have loved your wife, and in every way carried yourself well towards her, yet if it has been either because she comes from rich parents, or because she is beautiful, or because she brought you a good portion, or because she in some way serves and pleases you in the flesh, and not because the Lord says in Eph. 5.25, “Husbands, love your wives;” you have not in this kept this commandment. And though you carried yourself ever so well towards your servants, yet if it has been so that they might praise you, or to make them follow your business more diligently and faithfully, and not because the Lord says, “Masters, give your servants that which is just and equal,” you have not in this kept this commandment. And though you have done your duty ever so well towards your magistrate, yet if it has been for fear of his wrath, and not for conscience’ sake, namely: because the Lord says, “Let every soul be subject to the higher powers,” you have not in this kept this commandment. And though you have given your minister his due maintenance, and invited him often to your table, and carried yourself ever so well towards him, yet if it has been so that he or others might think you are a good Christian, and a kind man, and not because the Lord says in Gal. 6.6, “Let him that is taught in the word, share all good things with him that teaches,” you have not in this kept this commandment.
Neo. Well, sir, I cannot tell what my neighbour Nomologista has done, but for my own part, I am sure, I have come far short of doing my duty in any relation that I have had to others; for when I was a child, I remember that many times I was stubborn and disobedient to my parents, and vexed if I might not have my will, and slighted their admonitions, and was impatient at their corrections, and sometimes despised and contemned them in my heart because of some infirmity, especially when they grew old; nor did I pray for them as it seems I should have done; and the truth is, if I did yield any obedience to them at all, it was for fear of their corrections, or some such by-respects, and not in conscience towards God. And when I was a servant, I did not think so reverently of, nor esteem so highly, my master and mistress as I should have done, but I was apt to slight and despise them, and did not yield such humble, reverent, and cheerful obedience as I should have done. Nor did I patiently and contentedly bear their checks and rebukes, but at various times had risings and swellings in my heart against them; nor was I so careful to maintain their good name and credit as I ought to have been; nor did I pray to the Lord for them as I ought to have done; and the truth is, all the obedience and subjection which I yielded to them, was for fear of their reproofs and corrections, or for the praise of men, rather than in conscience to the Lord’s commandment.
And when I entered into the married estate, I was not careful to choose a religious wife; no, I aimed at beauty more than piety. And I have not dwelt with my wife as a man of knowledge; no, I have expressed much ignorance and folly in my carriage towards her; nor have I loved her as a husband ought to love his wife. For though it is true that I have had much fond affection towards her, yet I have had but little true affection, as evident in that I have been easily provoked to anger and wrath against her, and have not carried myself patiently towards her. Nor have I been careful to maintain my authority over her, but have lost it by my childish and indiscreet carriage towards her; nor have I lived so cheerfully and delightfully with her as I ought to have done, but I have carried myself very heavily, discontentedly, and uncomfortably towards her; nor have I been careful to instruct and admonish her as I should. And though now and then I have reproved her, yet for the most part it has been in a passion, and not with the spirit of meekness, pity, and compassion; nor have I prayed for her either so often or so fervently as I should. And whatever I have done that has been well done, I have been moved to it, in former times especially, by something in her, or done by her, rather than by the commandment of God. And since I became a father and a master, I have not done my duty either to my children or to my servants as I should. For I have not had such care, nor taken such pains for their eternal good, as I have done for their temporal. I have had more care, and taken more pains to provide food and raiment for them, than I have to admonish, instruct, teach, and catechize them; and if I have reproved or corrected them, it has been because they have in some way offended me, rather than because they have offended God; and truly, I have neither prayed for them so often, nor so fervently as I should. In a word, whatever I have done by way of discharging my duty to them, I fear me, it has been out of natural affection, or to avoid the blame, and gain the good opinion of men, rather than out of conscience to the Lord’s will and commandment.
And if I have at any time carried myself well, or done my duty either to magistrate or minister, it has been for fear or praise of men, rather than for conscience’ sake towards God — so far have I been from keeping this commandment perfectly: the Lord be merciful to me!
Evan. Assure yourself, neighbour Neophytus, this is not your case alone, but the case of every man that has stood in all these relations to others, as it seems you have done, as I am confident any man that truly knows his heart will confess, yes, and any woman that is well acquainted with her own heart, I am persuaded, will confess that she has not had such a reverent esteem and opinion of her husband as she should, nor so willingly yielded herself to be commanded, governed, and directed by him as she should, nor loved him so truly as she should; nor been so helpful to him any way as she should, nor prayed either so often or so fervently for him as she should; and I fear, most women do all that they do out of fear of their husband’s frowns, or to gain his favour, rather than out of conscience to the Lord’s will and command.
And where is the magistrate that is so careful to establish in his dominions such good and wholesome laws as he should, or to see them executed or put into practice as he should, or that is so careful to uphold and maintain the truth of religion as he should, or that is so careful to provide for the peace, safety, and welfare of his people as he should? Or where is the magistrate that does not do what he does for some other cause, or for some other end, rather than because God commands them, or to the end that he may please him?
And where is the minister that does his duty in his position as he should? I am sure, for my own part, I have neither so diligently nor so faithfully preached the pure word of God as I should; nor so fully or truly expounded it and applied it to my hearers as I should; nor so poured out my soul to God for them in prayer as I should; nor have I gone before them as a pattern of imitation in holiness of life and conduct, as I should: the Lord be merciful to me!
Neo. Well, sir, now I entreat you to proceed to speak of the sixth commandment as you have done of the rest.