Trusting God for Countless Others
Trusting God for
Countless Others
These journal entries concern a time of crisis in God’s care
for the several orphan houses and thousands of orphans
in Bristol. These demonstrate how God meets the
needs of His people on a daily basis.
A Solemn Crisis (1838)
September l0th. Monday morning. Neither Saturday nor yesterday had any money come in. It appeared to me now needful to take some steps on account of our need, i.e., to go to the Orphan Houses, call the brethren and sisters together (who, except brother T—, had never been informed about the state of the funds), state the case to them, see how much money was needed for the present, tell them that amidst all this trial of faith I still believed that God would help, and to pray with them. Especially, also, I meant to go for the sake of telling them that no more articles must be purchased than we have the means to pay for, but to let there be nothing lacking in any way for the children as regards nourishing food and needful clothing; for I would rather at once send them away than that they should lack. I meant to go for the sake also of seeing whether there were still articles remaining that had been sent for the purpose of being sold, or whether there were any articles really needless, that we might turn them into money. I felt that the matter was now come to a solemn crisis. About half-past nine sixpence came in, which had been put anonymously into the box at Gideon Chapel. This money seemed to me like an earnest, that God would have compassion and send more. About ten, after I had returned from brother Craik, to whom I had unbosomed my heart again whilst once more in prayer for help, a sister called who gave two sovereigns to my wife for the orphans, stating that she had felt herself stirred up to come, and that she had delayed coming already too long. A few minutes after, when I went into the room where she was, she gave me two sovereigns more, and all this without knowing the least about our need. Thus the Lord most mercifully has sent us a little help, to the great encouragement of my faith. A few minutes after I was called on for money from the Infants’ Orphan House, to which I sent £2, and £1 Os. 6d. to the Boys’ Orphan House, and £1 to the Girls’ Orphan House. Today I saw a young brother who, as well as one of his sisters, had been brought to the knowledge of the Lord through my Narrative.
September 13th. This morning I found it was absolutely needful to tell the brethren and sisters about the state of the funds, and to give directions as to not going into debt, etc. We prayed together and had a very happy meeting. They all seemed comfortable. There was 12s. 6d. taken out of the boxes in the three houses, 12s. one of the laborers gave, and £1 1s. had come in for needlework done by the children. One of the sisters, who is engaged in the work, sent a message after me, not to trouble myself about her salary, for she should not want any for a twelvemonth. What a blessing to have such fellow laborers!
September 14th. I met again this morning with the brethren and sisters for prayer, as the Lord has not yet sent help. After prayer one of the laborers gave me all the money he had, 16s., saying that it would not be upright to pray, if he were not to give what he had. One of the sisters told me, that in six days she would give £6, which she had in the Savings’ Bank for such a time of need. God be praised for such fellow-laborers! Up to this day the matrons of the three houses had been in the habit of paying the bakers and the milkman weekly, because they had preferred to receive the payments in this way, and sometimes it had thus been also with the butcher and grocer. But now, as the Lord deals out to us by the day, we considered it would be wrong to go on any longer in this way, as the week’s payment might become due and we have no money to meet it; and thus those with whom we deal might be inconvenienced by us, and we be found acting against the commandment of the Lord, “Owe no man anything” (Rom 13:8). From this day and henceforward, whilst the Lord gives to us our supplies by the day, we purpose therefore to pay at once for every article as it is purchased, and never to buy anything except we can pay for it at once, however much it may seem to be needed, and however much those with whom we deal may wish to be paid only by the week. The little which was owed was paid off this day. When I came home I found a large parcel of new clothes, which had been sent from Dublin for the orphans—a proof that the Lord remembers us still. We met again in the evening for prayer. We were of good cheer, and still BELIEVE that the Lord will supply our need.
September 15th. Saturday. We met again this morning for prayer. God comforts our hearts. We are looking for help. I found that there were provisions enough for today and tomorrow, but there was no money in hand to take in bread as usual in order that the children might not have newly-baked bread. This afternoon one of the laborers, who had been absent for several days from Bristol, returned and gave £1. This evening we met again for prayer, when I found that 10s. 6d. more had come in since the morning. With this £1 10s. 6d. we were able to buy, even this Saturday evening, the usual quantity of bread and have some money left. God be praised, Who gave us grace to come to the decision not to take any bread today as usual, nor to buy anything for which we cannot pay at once.
September 17th. The trial still continues. It is now more and more trying, even to faith, as each day comes. Truly, the Lord has wise purposes in allowing us to call so long upon Him for help. But I am sure God will send help, if we can but wait. One of the laborers had had a little money come in, of which he gave 12s. 6d.; another laborer gave 11s. 8d., being all the money she had left: this with 17s. 6d.—which partly had come in and partly was in hand—enabled us to pay what needed to be paid and to purchase provisions, so that nothing yet in any way has been lacking.
This evening I was rather tried respecting the long delay of larger sums coming; but being led to go to the Scriptures for comfort, my soul was greatly refreshed and my faith again strengthened by the 34th Psalm, so that I went very cheerfully to meet with my dear fellow-laborers for prayer. I read to them the psalm, and sought to cheer their hearts through the precious promises contained in it.
Coming to Extremities
September 18th. Brother T. had 25s. in hand, and I had 3s. This £1 8s. enabled us to buy the meat and bread that was needed; a little tea for one of the houses, and milk for all; no more than this is needed. Thus the Lord has provided not only for this day, but there is bread for two days in hand. Now, however, we are come to an extremity. The funds are exhausted. The laborers who had a little money have given as long as they had any left. Now observe how the Lord helped us! A lady from the neighborhood of London who brought a parcel with money from her daughter, arrived four or five days since in Bristol, and took lodgings next door to the Boys’ Orphan House. This afternoon she herself kindly brought me the money, amounting to £3 2s. 6d. We had been reduced so low as to be on the point of selling those things which could be spared; but this morning I had asked the Lord, if it might be, to prevent the necessity of our doing so. That the money had been so near the Orphan Houses for several days without being given, is a plain proof that it was from the beginning in the heart of God to help us; but, because He delights in the prayers of His children, He had allowed us to pray so long; also to try our faith, and to make the answer so much the sweeter. It is indeed a precious deliverance. I burst out into loud praises and thanks the first moment I was alone, after I had received the money. I met with my fellow-laborers again this evening for prayer and praise; their hearts were not a little cheered.
September 20th. Morning. The Lord has again kindly sent in a little. Last evening was given to me 1s. 6d., and this morning £1 3s. Evening. This evening the Lord sent still further supplies; £8 11s. 2½d. came in, as a further proof that the Lord is not unmindful of us. There was in the box of the Girls’ Orphan House £1 1s., and in that of the Boys’ Orphan House £1 7s. 2½d.
One of the laborers, in accordance with her promise this day week, gave £6 3s. About eighteen months ago she saw it right no longer to have money for herself in the Savings’ Bank, and she therefore, in her heart, gave the money which she had there to the Orphan Houses, intending to draw it in a time of need. Some time since (she told me this evening) she drew a part of it to buy several useful articles for the Orphan Houses; now the sum was reduced to £6. When she found out the present need, she went this day week to the Savings’ Bank, and gave notice that she wished to draw her money today.
Truly, as long as God shall be pleased to give me such fellow-laborers, His blessing will rest upon the work. This £8 11s. 2½d. was divided this evening to supply the three houses, and we thanked God, unitedly, for His help.
September 29th. Saturday evening. Prayer has been made for several days past respecting the rent, which is due this day. I have been looking out for it, though I knew not whence a shilling was to come. This morning brother T. called on me and, as no money had come in, we prayed together, and continued in supplication from ten till a quarter to twelve. Twelve o’clock struck (the time when the rent ought to have been paid), but no money had been sent.
For some days past I have repeatedly had a misgiving, whether the Lord might not disappoint us, in order that we might be led to provide by the week, or the day, for the rent. This is the second, and only the second, complete failure as to answers of prayer in the work, during the past four years and six months. The first was about the half yearly rent of the Castle-Green school room, due July 1st, 1837, which had come in only in part by that time. I am now fully convinced that the rent ought to be put by daily or weekly, as God may prosper us, in order that the work, even as to this point, may be a testimony. May the Lord, then, help us to act accordingly; and may He now mercifully send in the means to pay the rent!
Whilst in this matter our prayers have failed, either to humble us, or to show us how weak our faith is still, or to teach us (which seems to me the most probable) that we ought to provide the rent beforehand; the Lord has given us again fresh proofs even this day that He is mindful of us. There was not money enough in the Girls’ Orphan House to take in bread (we give the bread to the children on the third day after it is baked); but before the baker came, a lady called who had had some needlework done by the children, and paid 3s. 11d., and thus the matron was able to take in bread as usual. I found this morning 2s. in the box in my house, our extremity having led me to look into it. One of the laborers gave 13s. This 15s. was divided amongst the three matrons. Thanks to the Lord, there is all that is needed for today and tomorrow.
September 30th. We are not only poor as regards the Orphan Fund, but also the funds for the other objects bring us again and again to the Lord for fresh supplies. Today, when we had not a single penny in hand, £5 was given for the other objects.
October 2nd. Tuesday evening. The Lord’s holy name be praised! He hath dealt most bountifully with us during the last three days! The day before yesterday £5 came in for the orphans. Of this I gave to each house 10s., which supplied them before the provisions were consumed. Oh! How kind is the Lord. Always, before there has been actual want, He has sent help. Yesterday came in £1 10s. more. This £1 10s., with 4s. 2d. in hand, was divided for present necessities. Thus the expenses of yesterday, for housekeeping, were defrayed.
The Lord helped me also to pay yesterday the £19 10s. for the rent. The means for it were thus obtained. One of the laborers had received through his family £10, and £5 besides from a sister in the Lord; also some other money. Of this he gave £16, which, with the £3 10s. that was left of the above mentioned £5, which came in the day before yesterday, made up £19 10s., the sum which was needed. This day we were again greatly reduced. There was no money in hand to take in bread as usual, for the Boys’ and Infants’ Orphan Houses, but again the Lord helped. A sister who had arrived this afternoon from Swansea brought £1 7s., and one of the laborers sold an article, by means of which he was able to give £1 13s. Thus we had £3, £1 for each house, and could buy bread before the day was over. Hitherto we have lacked nothing!
October 6th. The Lord has most kindly helped us. It came to my mind that there were some new blankets in the Orphan Houses, which had been given some time since, but which are not needed, and might therefore be sold. I was confirmed in this by finding that moths had got into one pair. I therefore sold ten pairs, having a good opportunity to do so. Thus the Lord not only supplied again our present need for the three houses, but I was also able to put by the rent for this week and the next, acting out the light that He had given us this day week. There came in 9s. 6d., besides £7 for the blankets. The School fund, also, was again completely exhausted, when today and yesterday came in so much, that not only the weekly salaries could be paid today, but also above £1 could be put by for rent.
October 9th. Through the last mentioned supplies for the orphans we were helped up to this day, but today we were brought lower than ever. The provisions would have lasted out only today, and the money for milk in one of the houses could only be made up by one of the laborers selling one of his books. The matron in the Boys’ Orphan House had this morning two shillings left. When in doubt whether to buy bread with it or more meat, to make up the dinner with the meat which she had in the house, the baker called and left three quarterns of bread as a present. In this great need, some money having been given to one of the laborers, he gave £2 of it, by which we were able to buy meat, bread, and other provisions. Nevertheless, even this day, low as we had been brought before this £2 was given, there had been all in the houses that was needed.
October 10th. The Lord had sent in so much since yesterday afternoon, that we were able at our meeting this morning to divide £2 0s. 2d. between the three matrons, whereby we are helped through this day. But now the coals in the Infants’ Orphan House are out, and nearly so in the other two houses. On this account we have asked the Lord for fresh supplies.
October 11th. The “Father of the fatherless” has again shown His care over us. An orphan from Devonshire arrived last evening. With her was sent £2 5s. 6d. The sister who brought her gave also a silver teapot, sugarbasin, and cream-jug, having found true riches in Christ. There was also in the boxes 9s. One of the laborers paid for a ton of coals. We obtained £16 16s. for the silver articles. Thus we were helped through the heavy expenses of the following days.
October 16th. The day commenced with mercies. I was looking up to the Lord for help early this morning, when, almost immediately afterwards, brother T. came, and brought two silver tablespoons and six teaspoons, which had been left anonymously yesterday afternoon at the Girls’ Orphan House. This afternoon I received £12 from Staffordshire. On the seal of the letter which enclosed the money was “Ebenezer” (1Sa 7:12). How true in our case! Surely this instance is a fresh “Ebenezer” to us; for hitherto the Lord has helped us.
October 27th. Saturday. This day we have been again mercifully helped, though our need has been almost greater than ever. But thanks to our adorable Lord! This day also we have not been confounded; for there was 6s. in the box at the Infants’ Orphan House, and 6s. came in for things which had been given to be sold. To this one of the laborers added 18s. By means of this £1 10s. we have been able to meet all pressing demands, and to procure provisions for today and tomorrow.
October 30th. This evening a sister gave me £20, ten of which were for the orphans, and ten for the other objects. Thus we are helped for this week.
November 4th. Lord’s Day. There was given by a stranger last Wednesday evening at Bethesda Chapel, to one of the sisters, a sovereign for the orphans, which I received today. Thus the Lord has again begun the week with mercy, and His love surely will help us through it, though again many pounds will be needed.
November 7th. The funds are now again completely exhausted. Today I divided £1 3s. 8d. which had come in yesterday; thus the necessary wants were supplied. The Lord be praised who has helped us hitherto!
November 13th. This morning our want was again great. I have £20 in hand which has been put by for rent, but, for the Lord’s honor, I would not take of it. Nothing had come in, and the laborers had scarcely anything to give. I went, however, to the Orphan Houses, to pray with my fellow-laborers, and, if it might be, to comfort them, and see what could be done. When I came there, I found that 19s. 6d. had come in this morning. On enquiry, I heard that only 2s. 6d. more was needed to carry us through the day. This one of the laborers was able to add. Thus the Lord has again helped us out of our difficulty. One of the laborers gave some things which he could do without, and another gave a workbox to be sold for the orphans. Before this day has come to an end, the Lord has sent in £1 2s. 4d. more, so that we have also a little for tomorrow.
November 17th. Today above £3 was needed, and as only 15s. 6d. had come in, we found it needful to determine to dispose of a few articles of furniture which we conveniently could do without. One of the laborers gave a good watch to be sold, which she had bought some months since, there being then no timepiece in one of the houses. In consideration of these articles to be sold, I took, for the present necessities of the orphans, £2 10s. of the money which had been put by for the rent, to be replaced when these articles could be sold at a suitable opportunity. Thus we were helped to the close of one more week.
November 20th. Today our need was exceedingly great, but the Lord’s help was great also. I went to meet with the brethren and sisters as usual. I found that £1 would be needed to supply the necessities of today, but 3s. only had come in. Just when we were going to pray, one of the laborers came in, who after prayer, gave 10s. Whilst we were praying, another laborer came in, who had received £1. Thus we had £1 13s.; even more, therefore, than was absolutely needed.
November 21st. Never were we so reduced in funds as today. There was not a single half-penny in hand between the matrons of the three houses. Nevertheless there was a good dinner, and, by managing so as to help one another with bread, etc., there was a prospect of getting over this day also. But for none of the houses had we the prospect of being able to take in bread. When I left the brethren and sisters at one o’clock, after prayer, I told them that we must wait for help, and see how the Lord would deliver us at this time. I was sure of help, but we were indeed straitened. When I got to Kingsdown, I felt that I needed more exercise, being very cold. Therefore, I went not the nearest way home, but round by Clarence Place. About twenty yards from my house, I met a brother who walked back with me, and after a little conversation gave me £10 to be handed over to the brethren, the deacons, towards providing the poor saints with coals, blankets, and warm clothing; also £5 for the Orphans, and £5 for the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. The brother had called twice while I was gone to the Orphan Houses, and had I now been one half minute later, I should have missed him. But the Lord knew our need, and therefore allowed me to meet him. I sent off the £5 immediately to the matrons.
November 24th. This again has been a very remarkable day. We had as little in hand this morning as at any time, and yet several pounds were needed. But “God, who is rich in mercy” (Eph 2:4) and whose Word so positively declares that none who trust in Him shall be confounded (1Pe 2:6), has helped us through this day also. While I was in prayer about ten in the morning respecting the funds, I was informed that a gentleman had called to see me. He came to inform me that a lady had ordered three sacks of potatoes to be sent to the Orphan Houses. Never could they have come more seasonably. This was an encouragement to me to continue to expect help. When I came to the prayer meeting about twelve o’clock, I heard that 2s. had come in, also £1 for a guitar which had been given for sale. The payment for this guitar had been expected for many weeks. It had been mentioned among us repeatedly, that it might come just at a time when we most needed it—and oh, how true! Also the watch which had been given was sold for £2 10s.
November 28th. This is, perhaps, of all days the most remarkable as yet, so far as regards the funds. When I was in prayer this morning respecting them, I was enabled firmly to believe that the Lord would send help, though all seemed dark as to natural appearances. At twelve o’clock I met as usual with the brethren and sisters for prayer. There had come in only 1s., which was left last evening anonymously at the Infants’ Orphan House, and which, except 2d., had already been spent on account of the great need. I heard also that an individual had gratuitously cleaned the timepiece in the Infants’ Orphan House, and had offered to keep the timepieces in the three houses in repair. Thus the Lord gave even in this a little encouragement, and a proof that He is still mindful of us. On enquiry I found that there was everything needful for the dinner in all the three houses; but neither in the Infants’ nor Boys’ Orphan Houses was there bread enough for tea, nor money to buy milk.
Lower we had never been, and perhaps never so low. We gave ourselves now unitedly to prayer, laying the case in simplicity before the Lord. Whilst in prayer there was a knock at the door, and one of the sisters went out. After the two brethren who labor in the Orphan Houses and I had prayed aloud, we continued for a while silently in prayer. As to myself, I was lifting up my heart to the Lord to make a way for our escape, and in order to know if there were any other thing which I could do with a good conscience, besides waiting on Him, so that we might have food for the children. At last we rose from our knees. I said, “God will surely send help.” The words had not quite passed from my lips, when I perceived a letter lying on the table, which had been brought whilst we were in prayer. It was from my wife, containing another letter from a brother with £10 for the orphans. The evening before last I was asked by a brother whether the balance in hand for the orphans would be as great this time, when the accounts would be made up, as the last time. My answer was that it would be as great as the Lord pleased. The next morning this brother was moved to remember the orphans, and to send today £10, which arrived soon after I had left my house, and which on account of our need was forwarded immediately to me. Thus I was enabled to give £6 10s. for housekeeping, and to put by £3 10s. for rent.
November 29th. The Lord has greatly blessed our meetings for prayer. In the evening I received £50, which was sent from Suffolk by a sister who had often expressed how gladly she would contribute more largely to the work that is in our hands, had she the means, and who just now, in this our time of need, has obtained the means to carry out the desire of her heart. I rejoice in the last donation particularly, not because of the largeness of the sum, but because it enables me to pay my brethren and sisters in the Orphan Houses the salary which is due to them. For though they are willing to labor without any remuneration, nevertheless “the laborer is worthy of his reward” (1Ti 5:18). This donation also proves that the Lord is willing even now, as formerly, to send large sums. But I expect still larger. The same sister who sent the £50 for the orphans, sent at the same time £30 to be divided between brother Craik and me for our personal expenses. How abundantly does the Lord care for us! Truly we serve a kind Master!
December 6th. This day our need was again as great as ever, but the deliverance of the Lord was also as manifest as ever. This afternoon I received £100 from a sister; £50 for the orphans and £50 for the School, Bible, and Missionary Fund. This same sister, who earns her bread with her own hands, had given on October 5th, 1837, £50 towards the Boys’ Orphan House, and gave for the necessities of the poor saints in August, 1838, £100 more; for she had been made willing to act out those precious exhortations: “Having food and raiment let us be therewith content” (1Ti 6:8). “Sell that ye have, and give alms; provide yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure in the heavens that faileth not, where no thief approacheth, neither moth corrupteth” (Luk 12:33). “Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal” (Mat 6:19-20).
December 11th, 12th, and 13th. On these three days there were public meetings, at which I gave an account of the Lord’s dealings with us in reference to the Orphan Houses, and the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. As the work, and particularly that of the Orphan Houses, was begun for the benefit of the church at large, it appeared well to us that from time to time it should be publicly stated how the Lord had dealt with us; and as the third year had been completed, this seemed to be a suitable time for having these meetings. Should any one suppose, in reading the plain details of the trials through which we passed during the four months previous to December 9th, 1838, respecting the Orphan Houses, that I have been disappointed as regards my expectations as far as the funds are concerned: my answer is that the reverse is the case. For straits were expected. Long before the trials came I had more than once stated publicly that answers to prayer in the time of need—the manifestation of the hand of God, stretched out for our help—was just the very end for which the Institution was established. I further state that the orphans have never lacked anything. Had I had thousands of pounds in hand, they would have fared no better than they have; for they have always had good nourishing food, the necessary articles of clothing, etc.